


Prussian/Ukrainian Problem

by Bikachan



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cutting, Finished it in 2020, Hetalia Countries Using Human Names, I wrote this in 2010, Other, Repost from FanFic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:53:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 41,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24169912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bikachan/pseuds/Bikachan
Summary: Inspired by Katyusha, Gilbert takes up a new hobby, cutting his wrists. Will he be able to hide his new form of stress relief from everybody? Takes place at the Hetalia School. No pairings, except for implied ones?
Kudos: 5





	1. Unfortunate Circumstances

**Author's Note:**

> (Written in 2010) My sad attempt at yet another angst-y story and Hetalia story. I hope I am able to not mess this one up.
> 
> Disclaimer: Nope, don't claim to own any of the characters, except for the story…

Gilbert hung out in the classroom just after his friends left to do their afterschool activities. "It's not as if I care! I'd much rather be alone anyways!" he said to himself, though some of the students left in the room heard him and started laughing, causing him to bear his fangs at them. Ivan then opened up the door, with the Baltic Trio behind him, and started looking around. When he noticed Gilbert, he waved his hand at him, while Gilbert waved his middle finger at him.

"Excuse me, have any of you seen my big sister~!" Ivan said with a smile.

Even though Ivan was in a grade lower then them, the remaining students were quick to give him a response, in that they didn't know where she was (even the ones who didn't know who his sister was). "Gil, would you happen to know where my sister might be?" Gilbert just glared at him from across the room from where he was, "Why the hell should I tell you?" Everyone suddenly stopped what they were doing, but Ivan continued to smile, "Why, I believe that is none of you business, da?" "Well then, I _believe_ I have nothing to tell you then, ja?" The corner of Ivan's mouth gave a short twitch, causing the trio behind him to tremble a bit.

"Well, if you must know, Gil Gil, I just wanted her to know I'll be coming home a little late today." He then stepped inside the room a little more, "Does that satisfy your question?" "I guess…but you know, I really don't know where she went." Ivan walked up to a desk and gripped down on it, "I see, so you were just leading me on? Now, that is not very nice, Gil Gil~!" Gilbert was pretty sure that if any of his friends were by his side, they would've stopped him from continuing as he was.

"You know what? I'm about tired of you calling me 'Gil Gil', Vanya!" Ivan looked Gilbert straight in the eyes, "What was that?" "You heard me! Anyways, it's not as if nobody noticed when Yekaterina left! I mean, it's so obvious!" Gilbert then put his hands in front of his chest, gesturing big breasts. Ivan, deciding not to contain his anger too much, pushed a row of desks to the back wall, with some lucky students still sitting in or around them.

"I would please ask you to not talk about my older sister in that manner, da?"

Gilbert just smirked at him, hoping he still looked unfazed by Ivan's actions, despite sweating at bit heavily. "Oh, you thought I was talking about your sister's big boobs? I'm sorry, but I was in fact talking about yours, fat ass!" At this point, most of the kids left the room, only to look from outside. Ivan was now very slowly walking toward Gilbert, not even trying to hide his anger, "What did you just say, Gil Gil?" he said as he push another row to the wall. Now Gilbert was sure Ivan was just trying to piss him off.

"What now? Deaf, on top of being fat? But I guess something would have to be on top of your fat, seeing as how it would just get crushed to oblivion!"

Despite feeling quite proud of himself for that not-corny-at-all line, he slowly pulled his bag on. "Welp, looks like it's time for me to be going on home now!" Now Ivan sped up to him, causing Gilbert to ungracefully make his way out the door. "Hey, get out of my way, people! I'm trying to home, damn it!" He quickly made his way through the door and out, while Ivan just stared at him. He walked to the door, thought a little bit, and then ran.

Gilbert started to slow down for a bit when he believed he was far enough away, until he looked back and saw that Ivan was actually give chase. "Oh crap!"

…

"Damn *pant* it! How…how does someone *pant* so fat *pant* able to catch up with…with the *pant* awesome me?!" Ivan had been chasing Gilbert for about 15 minutes, and he knew he wouldn't be able to last any longer, "I'm not on the track team, damn it!"

Gilbert turned into the old part of the school, which he had been avoiding this whole time. Not a lot of classes took place there and not a lot of students wanted out there, except for couples who didn't mind making out in quiet, rickety classroom. Gilbert laughed to himself at that thought. He began scanning the rooms to see which one would be to best to hide in. "Wait a minute, if I actually do hide out in one of these rooms, it would only be a matter of time before ' _der Dicke_ ' finds me and I can only imagine three possible outcomes for me:

1\. He kills me

2\. He violates me

3\. All of the above

And knowing him, it will probably be all three in order!"

He then saw two bathrooms and while Ivan was far enough, ducked into to girl's bathroom, "He would never think to look in here!" He whispered to himself. It looked pretty messy in there, with a broken mirror and a flickering light bulb, while the others were just a little dim. Gilbert decided to hide in the stall with the door that had the less writing on it. When he pushed opened the door, he was shocked to see a girl sitting down, " _Heilige_ _Scheiße_ _! Es tut_ _mir leid_ _!_ _Ich wollte nicht_..." He slowly uncovered his eyes when he started hearing some whimpering, some that he's heard before.

There, in the stall was Ivan's older sister, except she wasn't using the toilet. She was sitting down, with one of her sleeves rolled up, holding a small pocket knife to her wrist. Smaller scars still visible on her bear arm. Tears began to form in her eyes as Gilbert moved closer to her inside of the stall, "I…I…I…"

"Shut up. Do you have any idea how much trouble I've gotten into because of you?"

Ivan suddenly opened up the door.


	2. Lessons Learned

As soon as the door opened, Katyusha quickly pulled Gilbert in, sits him on the toilet, and pushes his legs up so his knees bend to his chest to hiding his feet. He felt even more cramped in because she was pushed up in front of him, trying to look out the door a little.

Ivan slowly walks around the bathroom, opening stalls and looking down to see any feet. He stops in front of the only closed stall and knocks on the door, "Knock, knock! Is anyone inside~?" Katyusha suddenly turns to Gilbert and then back at the closed door.

"Vanya…is that you?"

'Vanya' quickly froze up, embarrassed and scared out of his mind that his older sister just found out he was in the girl's bathroom and almost walked in on her.

"Oh, uhh, wrong room!"

He immediately sprinted out of there, forgetting all about Gilbert. Katyusha stuck her head out from the stall and to the door, "Was that really Vanya? What was he doing…?"

"Your…ass!"

"What?" She turned around and realized that she was pushing up against Gilbert's knees more than before. "Move your gigantic ass…now!" "Sorry!" She quickly turned around, "Are…are you alright?" Gilbert rubbed his chest and started breathing heavily, until he realized where he was. As the timid girl reached out to touch him, he quickly grabbed her arm, "Am _I_ alright? What about _you_?"

She quickly pulled her arm back, "Wha-wha-wha-what are you talking about? I was just…sitting on the toilet!" He crossed his arms and legs, still sitting on the toilet, and cocked his head to the side, "You know, for being Ivan's big sister, you sure can't lie like him." "What the he-, what is that supposed to mean?" He quickly stood up and grabbed her arm again, "I clearly saw you holding a knife to your arm!" She tried to back away, but hit the door, "S-so what? It's none of you business anyways…" Gilbert really did hate this situation as much as she did.

"Listen, Yekaterina! It's your fault that I'm sitting on this nasty ass toilet! I didn't get chased across the whole school by your fat ass of a brother for fucking nothing, okay? So don't give me any of this bullshit that you were just 'sitting on the toilet'! Just tell me what the hell you were doing in here, okay?" The girl stared at him wide-eyed for a good while until those eyes filled with tears, "I…I…I didn't do…"

"Oh crap…" He let go of her arm and tried to think over everything that had just happened. As she began to whimper, Gilbert grabbed her hand, "Katyusha, Katyusha…can I call you Kat?" She quickly shook her head no. "Excellent! Okay, Kat, I'm really sorry I yelled at you, alright? I just…I had a really bad day today and, well, you slitting your wrists isn't really helping…" She started to shake more.

"Okay, okay, okay! I shouldn't have yelled at you just because of my crappy life, okay?"

She immediately stopped and Gilbert quickly tried to correct himself, "Hey, I mean…today was just an off day! Really, come on! I'm freaking awesome Gilbert Beilschmidt! My life is so awesome, I don't anybody else to mess it up, you know?" He starting to laugh. "No, I don't." "Oh…" Gilbert sat back down. "Okay, Gilbert, I'll tell you what I was doing." He looked up as she pulled up her sleeves, "I wasn't trying to slit my wrists I was just…cutting them a little." "Oh…what's the difference?" She just stared at him, angry.

"Ви такий прикрий ідіот! I wasn't trying to kill myself!"

"What in the hell did you just say to me? And also, how the hell was I supposed to know the difference?" She just glared at him. "Oh wait! Now I understand! You're one of those…goth-y, emo kids who slit their writs for attention, wanting to feel the pain of the blade because you just want to feel something in this cold, dark world?" Gilbert took that moment to imagine Katyusha with black hair, black clothes, and black make up sitting in a dark corner with tears in her eyes. He began laughing again to himself.

Katyusha could only cover her face with her hand, remember why she never bothered to talk with him before, "You are so…okay, just listen! First of all, there is a difference between goth and emo, okay?" "You would know…" "And second, I am _not_ doing this for attention! Why would I do that? I would never want anybody to find out about this, you jerk!" Her eyes started to water again. "Okay! I get it! Damn!" He took a closer look at her arm, "So, why _are_ you doing this?"

She breathed in, then out. "I just…there's so much in my life I just can't handle. I'm pretty sure you've felt stressed or extremely down before, as if you couldn't handle all of the stuff life slams at you." Gilbert scowled, "No, I haven't." Katyusha leaned against the door and looked away, "I noticed in class, Gilbert. When all of your friends leave you all alone afterschool because of clubs…you always look so sad." "What the hell! You don't know anything! Who the hell said you could analyze my life like that?" She gave him a serious stare, so he clammed up for a bit.

"Gilbert, why did you quit the baseball team?"

Gilbert shot up, grabbed her shoulders, and slammed the girl against the door, "Now you listen to me! We are _not_ talking about me, okay! So just answer the fucking question already!" Katyusha kept her eyes closed, "That feeling you have right now? That's why I do it. I can't stand that feeling!" He slowly let go of her and quietly said, "What are you talking about?" "Those horrible feelings…I don't know what to do with them! I do it because I want them to go away…and they do."

"Couldn't…couldn't you just take up a hobby or something?" he quickly mumbled. "I'm not good at anything and the only club I joined was the agriculture club and I'm pretty much the only member." Gilbert didn't even know that club still existed, "Well, how about friends? I know all of the guys in class love you! Get a boyfriend and you'll be all set!" She smiled weakly, "Do you really think those guys like me for me or my chest?" Gilbert crossed his arms and thought about it. The fact that he was thinking caused Katyusha to feel more depressed and she unlocks the stall door, readying to leave.

"Wait! I was kidding! The guys in class really do like you! Your huge boobs are just a huge bonus for them!"

His utter bluntness caused her to giggle, "I guess…but even so, I could never get a boyfriend when I have an overprotective brother like Vanya…" "Yeah, I see your point. That crazy homo does have a bit of a sibling complex…" She opened her mouth to comment on how messed up and hypocritical that sentence was, but she just sighed and shook her head, "Anyways, the guys are only nice to me in class, but once class is over they quickly disappear! Vanya thinks I don't know about what he does, but I eventually knew ever since this one guy I liked a while back told me. And it's not just guys! It's not fair!" "Yeah, that's gotta suck…"

She held out her arm and took out her pocket knife, "So, that's why. It…it really does take the stress away…" Gilbert's eyes opened wide as he saw her slowly cut her wrist, "Does it hurt?" She was surprised by how well he was taking this, "Um, no. I do it to take the pain away." She grabbed his arm, "I…I'll show you!" Even though he was a little scared about the pain, he didn't want her know that. "C-clean off that knife first!" She grabbed to toilet paper and wiped it clean. As she slowly drug the knife across his skin, Gilbert flinched and backed away. His flinching caused Katyusha to accidently cut deeper, "Sorry!"

"Damn it, bitch! That hurt!" She flicked his forehead with her finger and sighed, "Well, maybe if you didn't flinch…" "I did not!" He grabbed some toilet paper and held it on his wrist as she tried to look away, "Well, I guess it's better if you do it yourself…and also, if you were in a different mood! I don't usually cut too deep." Gilbert moved the paper from his arm and stared at it.

"Gilbert?"

He quickly looked back at her, "What?" "Is your arm…bad?" He sighed and began walking past her, "I've been in here too long…I gotta go." "Gilbert, wait!" He stopped in front of the room door. "I…do you think we could hang out sometime?" Gilbert turned around and was surprised at how flustered and nervous Katyusha looked, so he gave a giant smile, "Well, I guess my awesome charms has won you over, hasn't it? I guess even girl-Ivan isn't immune to my massive-" Katyusha gives him a split-second look of disgust before turning completely around, "Yeah…well, I was thinking more like talking to you in and out of class!"

"Out of class? Are you crazy? That psycho you call a brother wi-" He stopped once it looked like she was going to cry again, "Okay, fine! We'll go 'hang out' together, if that's what you wanna do!" She squealed and ran over to him, "I knew you had some kindness in you somewhere!" "Hey!" She pulled out a small razor blade, "Here." Gilbert took it, "Wow…usually, girls give guys chocolate or something…" "I believe that the two of us understand each other and will be great friends, so…call me if you ever need to talk!" She took his cell phone and put her number in it and ran out the door.

He wrapped the blade in paper and put it away, "I can't believe I spent all that time with her and didn't hit her once."


	3. Home Alone

Once Gilbert got home, he made a beeline to his bedroom. He fell on his bed face down and laid there for about ten minutes. He finally moved his head up enough so that his mouth was uncovered. "West~! West!" He waited a few second before confirming that his brother wasn't back yet. He knew his grandfather wouldn't be back for awhile, being the vice principal and all.

He moved his head around some more so that he could look up at the bird cage at the corner of the room. He always left the cage open so his bird could fly around freely. His grandfather told him that the bird will fly away, but Gilbert told him that his bird was too awesome to do that. Granted, he flew away once, but he came back on what Gilbert will swear on his life was just an 'adventure'.

He closed his eyes and remembered the day when he told Antonio and Francis why he kept it open.

…

"I just think that he looks trapped in there, so…I allow him to fly around and spread his wings whenever he wants!" Gilbert said with a very nonchalant look on his face.

Antonio clapped, which surprised Gilbert, "That was so beautiful, Gil Gil!" He then proceeded to hug the other. "Don't call me that! And I wasn't trying anything, I was serious!" Gilbert looked to Francis, who gave him a serious look, "H-hey, Fran…what's up? Don't tell me Toni's got you thinking weird too?"

"I…Gilbert, do you feel trapped in your life?"

They stared at each other, making Gilbert feel nervous and Antonio confused. "Kesesese! You're so silly, Franny! You shouldn't look so serious!" Gilbert tried not to sound as nervous as he did. Francis sighed and smiled, "Silly Gilbert, don't you know that I am _always_ serious?" He joined in the hug, making Antonio happy again.

Gilbert was laughing, trying to push them off and glad that he was able to change the subject. Francis put his mouth to the German's ear, "You know you could always talk to me about anything, mon lapin blanc." Gilbert was surprised by how serious his friend was acting, as unneeded as it was. "Francis, stop wor-" Francis started sucking on his ear.

"Damn you, you perverted bastard!"

He threw his friends off of him, but Antonio didn't see what happened and wanted to know while trying to hug his friend again. Gilbert was ignoring him to focus on pushing away Francis, who was also trying to hold him, albeit with his tongue sticking out. "Stop playing around and be quiet, boys!" Gilbert's grandfather yelled out.

….

Gilbert grabbed his pillow, "Stupid old man. Stupid Antonio and Francis!" He threw the pillow at the bird cage causing it to sway.

"Shit!"

He quickly ran up to it to make sure his bird wasn't in it. "Damn it! That was close. Where _are_ you, boy!" He made a quick scan of his messy room before hearing small peeps above his head, "There you are!" He took his little friend from his head and nuzzled him on his cheek. The bird got out of his grasp and flew over to Gilbert's cell phone and started chirping and flapping its wings. "Damn it, boy! I don't need to call any of those bastards! I'm fine by myself!"

He shooed his bird away from the phone and put it under his pillow. The bird sat on top of the pillow staring at him, "What? You think I'm pathetic, like Francis did? The pervert!" He walked back and forth a couple of times, "I can find something to do! I mean, West and Gramps won't be back for at least three hours, so I can find plenty to do on my own….again."

He began playing some video games on his consoles and PC, but got bored quickly. He looked at the clock and realized that only 35 minutes passed by. He yelled out, frightening his bird, and throwing some more stuff around the room. He looked at the little piece of his phone peeking out from under the pillow.

"Wonder what that big breasted crybaby is doing…"

He pulled out the razor blade and stared at it. "Damn it!" He sat up on his bed and held out his arm. He tried to remember the pain he felt when Yekaterina cut him, but realized it didn't feel that bad. "I'm not doing this because I'm bored, damn it…" He mumbled to himself. He slowly pressed the corner in his skin and started shaking.

"Damn it! This is something only pussies do!"

Even though he said it, he didn't move the blade away. He finally sighed and swiftly moved the blade across his wrist, "Damn it all!" He grabbed a towel from the floor and pressed it against the cut, "How does that bitch do it all the time…not that it hurt…" It actually didn't hurt as much as he thought. What actually hurt was the initial prick. He picked up his phone again and looked through the names, "I wonder who I should call now…" He stopped at his brother's name, "Ha! I bet West would love to hear from his awesome brother!" Ludwig noticed he phone vibrating and sighed when he saw the name.

"Yes, what is it, Bruder?"

"Kesesese! Why do you sound like that, West? Don't you want to talk to your awesome brother?"

Ludwig let out a huge sigh, "I am at practice right now you know that! It's a good thing the team is taking a break right now…" Gilbert smiled at his bird, "See? Didn't I just prove how awesome I am for calling you right when you're not busy?"

"Gilbert, why did you call me?"

"I just wanted to know how my little brother was doing~!" Ludwig frowned, "Are you at home right now?" Gilbert got a little confused that his brother answered his question with another, "…Yes, why?" "Bruder, why don't you join a club already? Or maybe even a sports club?" "You know damn well why I won't! Do you have some kind problem with me being here?"

Ludwig wanted to tell his brother he was being stubborn, but really didn't want to argue over the phone, especially in front of his teammates. "Listen, we'll talk more when I get back. I ne-" "No, you listen! I just called to hear how you are, but obviously you don't want to talk to me!" This wasn't turning out as he hoped, "Bruder, I-"

"You just said that you're on a break but now you wanna hang up? You're just like the others, too busy to care or talk to me!"

Gilbert hung up. Granted, he lied a bit about others not talking to him since he hadn't called them yet, but he was still pissed. "West is becoming more and more like that old man everyday! Why couldn't he love me like he use to?" He threw the phone on a pile of clothes and tried to calm down. "Maybe I…overreacted a bit…no, never!" He took his phone and looked up names again, "Let's see…after Ludwig, Toni and Fran are out of the question, those perverts. If I attempt to call Liza or Rod they'll just chew out my ass…damn!" He couldn't believe all the people on his phone were busy.

He saw a name he didn't immediately recognize, "Oh yeah! This guy! Kesese, Roddy isn't the only relative I have!" The phone kept ringing and ringing until it picked up, "Hello?" "Aha! You old bastard, I haven't seen you around school lately! Still hanging out with that Norwegian guy, ja?" The person on the other line started clearing his throat.

"I think ya want my brother…"

"Wha? Who's this?"

"You called. Who are you?" Gilbert heard that voice before, so he decided to drop any formalities.

"You never heard such an awesome voice before? I am the awesome Gilbert! I'm sure you've heard of me." CLICK!

Gilbert called again. "What do you want?" "Kesese, I just told you who I am, so why not tell me who you are?" The other person sighed, "You want my brother. Guess!" "Um…Ma…no. Sor…" "It's Berwald!" Berwald didn't like to raise his voice to many people, but this was Gilbert. "Yes, Waldy! How the hell are you?" "I'm hangin' up." "No! Wait!" Gilbert didn't understand why he wanted to hang up.

"Is your brother there?"

"No." Berwald stayed silent.

"So, where is he?"

"Out."

Gilbert hated talking to this guy, "When the hell is he coming back?" "Don't know, don't care." "Well, since you're here, why don't you tell me how _you_ are?" Something about that made Berwald's skin crawl, "Why?" "Damn it, man! We're family, so if I wanna know how you are just tell me!"

Berwald wanted to hang up again, but had nothing better to do, "I'm fine." Gilbert was proud that he got the silent giant to talk with him. "Good, good. So, are you still hanging out with that sweet Finnish boy, ja?" This was starting to get a little weird. "Yes?" Gilbert stood up, "You know, I think that boy is…a bad influence!" "V-vad?"

"I know that kid looks all sweet and innocent, but I bet that it's all an act!"

Berwald was totally confused, "Y-you just called him sweet!" Gilbert laughed, "Oh, Berry, just listen to me!" "Don't call me Be-" "He's just trying to corrupt you! I know that under that hard exterior of yours is a sweet, hot, and innocent little boy!" That was it.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"See! The little Berry I know would never say such things to the awesome me! You're better off without him! I, on the other, would be per-" CLICK!

Gilbert called back six times, but Berwald never picked up. "Damn it! Why won't he pick up! What the hell!" Gilbert honestly didn't understand why and was now even more angry, "Fine! I'll call the stupid bitch!" His bird flew on the headboard and looked at Gilbert, "You got a problem with me?" They stared at each other before sighing or what sounded like sighing for a bird.

"Hello?"

"Yekaterina, it's me! Don't think I'm calling you just because I wanted to hear from you or anything. I'm just bored and…"

"Do you want my sister? Who is this?"

"…Your daddy, now get Yekaterina!"

Gilbert had to admit that he was a little embarrassed for yelling out again. Natalia, on the other hand, was pissed off. "Your voice sounds…familiar. I do not know who the hell you think are, but I will make sure that when I hear your voice again I _will_ stab out your throat with one of my knives." Gilbert had a feeling that if Ivan and Yekaterina were both crazy then their sister had to be, but this was too much! She sounded so calm as if it would be an easy task.

"And afterward, I will crush your voice box with my hands. As you are holding your precious neck on your knees, it will then force your pants down and take the handle of the knife and fu-"

"Natasha, have you…oh, you're on the phone!"

Natalia looked back at her sister and at the phone, weighing her opinions. Should she continue to insult this familiar person who brought up her father or have her sister talk to him? She held up the phone, "Sister, the phone is for you." "Really? For me?" She put the phone to her ear, "Hel-"

"You stupid bitch! Why the hell did you give me your home number! You better delete me from this phone, damn it!"

"Gilbert?" she whispered.

She looked at her sister, "Katyusha, who is that?" Yekaterina was afraid of the look on her sister's face. "Gilbert, I'll call you on my cell, okay?" "You better!" She quickly pulled out her phone and dialed the number. Her sister was still staring, "It's just a classmate, don't worry!"

She ran to her room and locked the door, "Gilbert?" He sighed, "What took you so long?" "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to give you my home number!" "That's a terrible mistake! What if that was your brother? He would be able to recognize my voice in an instant!" Not that Natalia was any better, but she didn't know him as well as Ivan.

"So, why did you call me?"

"Um…" Gilbert didn't know what to say. Didn't know if he should admit he has no one else to talk to. "I…I tried cutting…" "Oh!" she was surprised he would call about that…or at all. "So, how did it go?" "It still hurt! The corner of your razor hurts when I poke it in my arm." Yekaterina thought a little bit, "Maybe you would feel more comfortable using a curved blade, like a small knife." Gilbert walked over to the kitchen drawer and found a small knife and took it with him. "Okay…"

Yekaterina smiled to herself knowing that Gilbert was listening, "I still find that a blade with a sharp point cuts better." Gilbert examined the blade and put it under his pillow, "I'll try it later." "So, is that all that you called for? Are you alone right now?" Gilbert blushed a bit, "Wh-what are you implying? That I don't have anything better to do than to talk to some crazy emo girl who cuts herself?" She stayed quiet for a few seconds, "Well, yes."

"I…I see."

"Gilbert, why won't you just admit that you're lonely?'

He felt insulted, "Don't act like you know me!" His bird started chirping at him. Gilbert knew that she was probably the only other person who understood, "Fine! I...if I do admit that…that I am, then it would only mean that I really _am_ …alone." "Gilbert…" He really didn't like sad moods.

"S-say, Kat, why don't you come over here and I won't be so lonely anymore? Kesesese!"

She sighed, "Can't you ever be serious for longer than three seconds?" "Hey, you brought down the mood with that lonely talk!" "Well, that is what crazy emo girls who cut themselves do!" They started laughing. Gilbert realized it wasn't too bad talking with her. "You're alright, Kat!" "Please don't call me Kat." "I think I will definitely hang out with you around school after all!" Yekaterina just realized he wasn't serious before, "Uh, sure. Sorry to do this to you, but I have to go now." "Oh…" She couldn't help but shed a tear at how sad he sounded.

"Can't we see each other before school in class?" Gilbert lit up, "Sure! I mean, if I'm not busy with anything." Katyusha smiled and hung up. Knowing he had nothing better to do, Gilbert decided to sleep until his brother came back.

…

"Gilbert, wake up."

"H-how?"

He said the first word that popped in his head. Gilbert couldn't believe that Ludwig would be back so soon. He wasn't exactly sure what time it was, but it seemed as if he just put his head down. He glanced down at his arm and saw it was still loosely wrapped around a towel. He really didn't want his brother to find out. He slowly sat up and rubbed he head, startling the poor bird on top.

Ludwig still felt a little uneasy waking up his brother after their little fiasco on the phone. He really did care about his brother, but still doesn't believe what he said was wrong. "Bruder, it's time for dinner. Grandfather is here…" Gilbert knew that when their grandfather was home he couldn't eat dinner in his room or the couch. "I see."

Gilbert waited a few minutes before getting up. He saw his grandfather sitting at the head of the table, waiting for him. Ludwig was sitting adjacent to him, "West is starting to look so much like the old man it's scary…" he mumbled to himself.

"Gilbert, please come to the table and eat with your family."

Gilbert got instantly put off that his grandfather thought he didn't want to eat with them, it was a chore to do but he still didn't mind. He pouted on his way next to him, across from his brother. The look on Gilbert's face made Ludwig think his brother was still mad at him, which was partly the case.

Opa Beilschmidt felt as if he could cut the tension in the room with his knife. If he was a humorous man, like the principal Mr. Vargas, he would literally try. Both of his grandsons were quiet. Well, Ludwig was generally silent at times, but Gilbert wasn't saying anything! Even when they had a fight Gilbert would start whining or arguing. As much as he would like to eat in peace this was not peaceful.

"S-so, Ludwig, how was school?"

Ludwig made sure when he looked up he didn't make eye contact with his brother, "Today was fine. I had a test today, so I wasn't too distracted at practice today." 'But you were still distracted?' Ludwig could almost hear Gilbert say when their eyes made brief contact. The tension almost seemed heavier.

"So, Gilbert, about you?"

"Itwasalright."

"Gilbert, I asked you a question and I expect you to give me a proper answer."

"It was fine, okay!"

"Do not yell at me!"

If Gilbert was as rebellious as he acted, he would have ignored or talked back at his grandfather. Instead, he looked down and mumbled a quick "I'm sorry" before going back to his food. Gilbert waited a few minutes before reaching for a bowl of mashed potatoes. Unfortunately, Ludwig grabbed it at the same time.

"West, I had it first."

"No, bruder. I did."

They glared at each other while tugging on the bowl, as their grandfather watch in amusement. Not that he would admit it. "Can you two please stop? You're not children anymore. You'll knock over the bowl!" They seemed to tug on the bowl harder until some got on Gilbert's arm, "Crap!"

As Gilbert lifted his arm to clean to, Ludwig noticed his cut, "Bruder! Wh-what happened to you?" "Damn it…" He quickly covered up his arm. Unfortunately for Gilbert, his arm was so pale that such a mark was too obvious to miss. His grandfather stood up and grabbed his arm, "Let me see...you're still bleeding! Don't you know how clean up a cut?" Gilbert pulled his arm away, "Mind your own business!" "How did this happen?" Gilbert started freaking out in his head. He couldn't tell them that he did it to himself. What would they think? Now he knew what Katyusha meant before.

"Was it afterschool?" Ludwig asked.

"Yes! I mean, what are you talking about?"

He hoped his brother didn't figure it out. "I heard some guys saying how you were being chased across school today. Did you cut yourself then?" Apparently he didn't know which was situation better. "Gilbert, you were getting into more mischief at school?" Apparently this wasn't good either.

"Listen, old man, I didn't ask to be chased across the school! So just drop it!" It's only times when he's really upset that Gilbert disrespected his grandfather.

"Like hell I will! When you cause trouble at my school and get yourself hurt because of foolishness, it becomes my problem!"

"Why do you care? It already happened, so leave me alone!"

He sighed and sat back down, "Don't you ever raise your voice at me like that! Why can't you ever learn how to behave yourself? Your arm is still bleeding! Can't you at least take care of that?"

"FINE!"

Gilbert threw his napkin on the table and ran to his room. He started kicking anything on the ground, cursing up a storm and then sat on his bed and tried to breathe in and out. He looked at his wrist and realized that tugging on the bowl with Ludwig must have reopened his cut. That and he never properly cleaned it.

Ludwig didn't know what to say. His grandfather still looked furious. "Gr-grandfather, I…I'm worried about Gilbert. He looked…" Gilbert quietly opened up his door and went into a hall closet to get the first aid supplies when he heard his grandfather.

"Ludwig, I wish your brother was more like you…"

Ludwig was shocked. Even more shocking was that he heard the sound of something falling and a door slamming. "Grandfather, please explain what you mean!" He sighed and crossed his arm, "I…didn't mean it like that. What I meant to say was that I wish your brother was more honest like you are." They stayed silent for the rest of the meal.

Gilbert threw his head down on his pillow, "Stupid fucking old geezer! What the hell? Wish I was just like West? I can't believe he…" Gilbert squeezed his eyes so hard that if he had tears they would fall, but nothing came out. "Damn it! I actually do wanna cry and I can't?"

He covered his face with the pillow and felt something under it. He grabbed the knife and stared at it. "Of…course…" He put it in his other hand, since he happened to be ambidextrous, and with little hesitation cut a thin line in his arm. He watched as the blood dripped from the cut, feeling as if all his anger went along with it.

"I guess this really does help."


	4. Brother Troubles

"Bruder, wake up."

Ludwig slowly knocked on his brother's door. He didn't know what to do. It was embarrassing since he had a fight with him the other day, but now his grandfather made it much worse. _For some reason, Gilbert thinks no one cares about him. After he heard what Grandfather said, I bet he definitely believes it now!_ Ludwig thought about it all night.

He was so worried about his brother that he overslept by ten minutes. Not too late, but bad enough for Ludwig. He knew he was late, but he still tried to wake up his brother. It was usually the last thing he did in the morning. All he did this morning was eat breakfast.

He knocked again, but still no reply. "Bruder!" He spoke a little louder, "Please, you're going to be late!" He slowly opened the door and looked around. The room was slightly neater than the last time he looked and even the bed was made, but no Gilbert.

"Bruder?"

He ran in the room and looked around again. He saw that the window was slightly opened. "Oh no! Wh-what if Bruder was…kidnapped!" Ludwig's mind ran wild with the idea of his older brother innocently sleeping in his bed while some stranger came in through the window and grabbing him out of the bed and out the window. "Bruder, no!"

Ludwig calmed himself down and realized that it couldn't have been possible because it looked like there were no signs of a struggle. He had already confirmed that the bed was made, which was odd in itself. Unless the kidnapper happened to fix his bed…

The next logical thing Ludwig thought of was that his brother simply ran way. To Ludwig, that was worse than kidnapping. He opened the closet and saw that there were still clothes inside. He then did a quick scan around the room. Gilbert was a pretty materialistic person, so he wouldn't run away without taking most of his stuff with him. If anything, he would never, ever leave his bird, which was sleeping in its cage, behind. Ludwig was pretty sure his brother would pick the bird over himself many times over.

The very _last_ thing he thought would ever happen would be if Gilbert went off to school early. He knew Gilbert was mad, but mad enough to wake up early just to avoid him? Not only that, but their grandfather usually left before they woke up, so Gilbert would've had to deal with him. When the door bell rang, Ludwig ran to the door and swung it open.

"Gilbert?"

"Ve…Ludwig, are you alright?"

He was surprised to see his friend at the door, "Feliciano? What are you doing here?" Feliciano got confused, "Ve~? You never came to my house! Did you forget there's school today? Did you wake up late?" He grabbed at his German friend's shirt making Ludwig realize that he wasn't ready at all. Feliciano at his door was proof enough.

He quickly pulled the other inside and dragged him along the house. "Ludwig, what's wrong?" Ludwig ran in the bathroom and tried to talk while brushing his teeth and combing his hair. "I spent so much time in Gilbert's room I didn't realize the time!" Feliciano couldn't hear anything, "Gilbert? I can't understand…" Ludwig finished and brought his friend to his room.

"It's Gilbert. He wasn't in his room this morning. Now that I think about it, maybe he left out of the window…yeah! So Opa wouldn't see him!" "Ludwig, what are you talking about? Did something happen to Gil?" Ludwig realized he wasn't making any sense.

"Sorry about that. You see, I got into a little bit of an argument with him last night, so he didn't want to talk to me last night." Feliciano was about to speak, but blushed and nodded his head. "I don't really understand Gilbert anymore. It's like the older we are the less we understand each other! I don't know what gave him the impression that nobody cares about him, but I really do. I don't know how I'm going to talk to him now after this…" Ludwig grabbed his backpack and took his friend's hand and ran out the door, "You know, last night my grandfather said something hurtful to Gilbert. He worded it the wrong way, but…why are you smiling?"

Feliciano wasn't used to seeing his friend so flustered, "Ludwig, you usually don't let me watch you change your clothes~!" "I what?" Ludwig was so worried about his brother that he was acting more like, well, Feliciano! "I tried to tell you, but you were so busy talking I didn't want to disturb you. You even motioned me to give you a shirt!" Ludwig's face got red, "I did, ja? Well…I see…"

He cleared his throat, "Anyways, the point is that things are weird between the two of us right now. I really wish he could find something to do afterschool instead of being home all alone." "Ve…wasn't he on the baseball team?" Ludwig walked slower, "Well, yes…but he quit. Remember when my brother broke his arm?" Ludwig grabbed his upper arm and Feliciano energetically nodded.

"Well, he wouldn't tell me how it happened, but I think Ivan Braginski was somehow involved. Anyways, after his arm healed, he went back to the team but quit soon after. I don't understand why he would do such a thing! He was the best hitter on that team and it seemed like the whole team respected him too, so why?"

"Maybe there's more to the story than you know."

Ludwig was shocked. Feliciano just told him something extremely sensible! He was always taking advantage of his friend's silly nature, but in truth he's actually pretty smart. No common sense, but very smart. "Of course, how could I be so blind?" Feliciano lightly bumped his shoulder with Ludwig's, "Ludwig likes to worry about other people so much! Must be a hobby, ve~!"

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here!" Feliciano laughed. "How do you and _your_ brother get along after you fight?" The Italian began to think, "Fratello and I don't usually get along, so arguments are a usual thing…ve…" Ludwig kinda felt sorry he asked.

Once they reached the school, Ludwig tried to stretch he arms but he noticed that they were holding hands, "Feliciano! Why are you holding my hand?" "Ve? But you were the one who grabbed my hand." He quickly let got of the other's hand, "W-well, why didn't you say something?"

"Was I supposed to?"

They went inside the school and Ludwig immediately went looking for his brother. "There he is!" He saw Gilbert wearing a shirt with long sleeves, which was strange since the weather was still warm. He ignored that and was about to walk up to him, until he saw his brother talking to a girl. He quickly hid behind a wall. "Ludwig~! What are you doing~?" Feliciano loudly said. Ludwig pulled him behind the wall before Gilbert could see him.

"It's Bruder! He's…he's…"

He pointed to the girl, "Ve? So what? She's cute! Haven't I seen…her…" Feliciano realized the problem. "I know! I thought Bruder hated that girl, but there his is laughing with her!" The Italian boy realized that much, but couldn't understand why Ludwig was so angry. "Ludwig, shouldn't you be happy that Gil has a girlfriend now?"

He sighed, "I-I guess. I just wish he could've told me! I mean, I know we had a fight last night, but she would be the last person…didn't he say he hated the whole family?" Feliciano frowned, "I don't think the whole family's bad. Natalia doesn't seem too bad!"

Said Belarusian girl walked down the hall and noticed Feliciano. He quickly winked and blew her a kiss, but she scowled at him and gave him the finger. "Waah! Ludwig, she's mean! Save me from her!" Feliciano clung tightly on his friend, who tried to pry him off. "Feliciano, get off of me right now!"

The two of them were making such a huge scene that they didn't even notice Gilbert watching them before he walked away.

…

In Gilbert's class, the teacher wanted the students to go into groups of two and complete their work. Immediately, Roderich and Elizabeta paired up, Yekaterina got surrounded by a group of boys wanting to working with her, and the bad friends trio had to decide who would be left out.

"So, rock-paper-scissors again?"

"Yep!"

After seven rounds of ties, Gilbert turned his head and sighed. He saw Yekaterina looking distressed trying to decide on a guy. He stood up, "You two can work together." Francis and Antonio were confused that he would give up so easily. Gilbert walked over to Katyusha, "Hey, wanna work together?" She gave him a huge smile, "Yes! Of course!" She apologized to the other boys and invited Gilbert to sit next to her. Everyone in the class looked at them.

"Damn it, Kat! Do you want to give people the wrong idea with that look of your face, you moron?"

"I'm sorry, I usually have trouble picking guys, but I don't mind you!"

"Miststück…."

After class, Elizabeta and Roderich stopped Gilbert in the hall. "Gilbert, why didn't you tell us?" Elizabeta confronted him first. "What the hell are you talking about?" She sighed, "I mean about you and Katyusha! She was so happy that you came up to her in class that something has to be going on!" Gilbert opened his mouth to yell, but then turned it into a smile.

"Ah, I see…you're jealous! Don't worry, baby! I'll always have eyes for you~!"

She pushed his face away, "Oh please…" Roderich cleared his throat, "She is right, you know. It really did look that way. We just want to know if it's true, Gilbert." Gilbert sneered, "Why do you care?" Roderich got a little angry, "Why wouldn't I? This is all quite sudden and without you saying a word about this is very unusual!"

"Ah, I see…you're jealous! Don't worry, baby! I'll always have eyes for you~!"

He pushed his head away, "I'm serious, Gilbert!" Gilbert grabbed his friend's arm, "Listen, you two! What the hell is the problem with me having a new friend? Do I have to report every little thing that happens to me?" "But, you usually _do_!" Elizabeta yelled back. Roderich pulled his arm away, "We were just asking, okay?"

"Nothing is going on between us, ja? If you weren't so busy all the damn time maybe I would've told you! I thought _you_ were the ones who got annoyed with me!"

The pair looked at each other, "Gilbert, we're sorry if it seemed like we were teasing you. We were just a little curious, that's all…" Elizabeta said. Gilbert walked past them, "I need to get to class…" Roderich walked up to Gilbert, but stopped, "Eliza, did we do something wrong?" She crossed her arms, "Something is up with him! He's told us how much he hated everybody from her family, so what changed in a day?" "I think I'll have a little talk with Antonio about this later."

Gilbert sat down in his seat with a huff, "What's with that interrogation bullshit?" He was suddenly surrounded by the Frenchman and the Spaniard, "Gilbert, we have to talk!" the latter said. Gilbert sighed, "No, Toni, you can't have my bird for the day. And no, Franny, you can't have me."

Antonio stuck his tongue out, "That was only once! And that's not what we came to talk about, right?" Francis looked away, "Uh, yes…of course!" "…Anyways, I can't believe you blew us off for Ivan's sister!" Gilbert put his hands on his face, "Not you two…nothing-is-going-on! What is with everybody today?"

Francis put his hand on Gilbert's shoulder, "We wouldn't blame you for going after such a beauty, but this particular beauty? I thought you hated her with a passion?" "Leave me alone! I just said nothing is going on between me and Kat!" Antonio pinched his cheeks, "Nothing is going on, yet you already have a cute nickname for her, Gil Gil?"

"Don't pinch me! And don't call me that!"

Francis frowned, "Gilbert, you never called me yesterday…Oh, I see! You must have been with her!" "Don't be such a smart ass, Francis. I didn't call you because every time I do you turn into such a bitchy fairy! And Toni doesn't even pick up at all." Francis frowned seriously, "I tell you every time when it is a good time to call, Gilbert."

"Please don't fight, you two! You'll make a scene and embarrass me!"

Francis smiled, "You call me everyday after school, mon amour. Either you love the sound of my beautiful voice or you've got a lot of free time on your hands." "You bastard!" "Why _did_ you quit baseball in the first place? Just because of one little incident you quit? Ce sont des conneries! I thought you were stronger then that. You're such a coward, Gilbert Beilschmidt!"

Gilbert slammed his fists on his desk, bringing attention to himself, "That wasn't some little incident, asshole! My arm was broken and it was all because of that fat-ass! I don't need _you_ to tell me whether I'm strong or if it's shit! Don't be such a hypocrite. Get the hell away from me!" "Tell me the truth or become a coward, fils de pute!"

Antonio got in between them, "Please, guys! Let's just agree that the both of you are cowards, okay! Everybody's looking!" They looked around and the whole class was watching them. The teacher was glaring at them, "Mr. Beilschmidt and Mr. Bonnefoy, if you will please quiet down! The rest of us are trying to learn." Francis quickly apologized while Gilbert just glared.

…

Immediately after school, Ludwig tried tracking down his brother again. "Ludwig, where are we going?" " _I_ am looking for my brother. _You_ are going to be late for your club!" Feliciano grabbed on to the other's arm, "But I don't have a meeting today! I wanna come with you!"

Ludwig sighed, "Fine, just don't slow me down." Feliciano waited a few minutes before talking again, "What are you going to say? I mean, to Gil?" He stopped walking, "I…I'll ask him why he quit baseball and maybe…about Ivan's sister." The Italian boy decided to stay silent the rest of the way.

Gilbert was talking with Yekaterina outside of the bathrooms at the old school building. "Gilbert, did you know that you don't have to only cut your arm?" "Really? Where else would you cut?" She made a quick scan around the area before pulling down the side of her pants to show Gilbert a little bit of her hip.

"See? If you don't want anyone to see fresh cuts all the time just do it on your thigh." Gilbert rubbed the marks, making her jump, "Gilbert!" He laughed, "What?" Ludwig heard his laughing and walked over fearlessly, "Bruder, there you are! We need to talk." The both of them jumped at the booming voice and Katyusha swiftly pulled her pants back up, only Feliciano noticing.

Gilbert glared, "What do you want? Can't you see I'm busy?" Ludwig back away a bit, "I know, but I have to talk to you!" Gilbert scowled, "Where the hell was this yesterday when you were busy? I just wanted to talk, but you were too busy and brushed me off. Now I'm busy and you won't leave me alone!" "Damn it, Bruder! I am so tired of this!" Ludwig tried calming down.

"Okay, please. I am very sorry about yesterday, ja? So, just let me finish what I have to say and-"

"Were you showing Gil your birthmark?"

Everyone stared at Feliciano in shock. Katyusha's face was completely red and Gilbert had his mouth open. Ludwig was more angry than surprised that his friend suddenly cut him off. "Y-yeah she did! Got a problem with that, Feli?" She was a little happy that he covered up for her, but knew that he was really covering up for himself.

"Bruder, I demand to know your relationship with this girl!"

"You what? Who the hell do you think you are? You sound just like Opa!"

Ludwig gritted his teeth. This was getting him nowhere. "Bruder, can-" "You don't deserve to know." Ludwig pointed at Katyusha, "You said that you hated her brother and her whole family! Now you're together with her? This is something I need to know about!"

"Are you some kind idiot? You don't _need_ to know anything! And who cares about what I said? She knows!"

"What…?"

"This has nothing to do with you, _Ludwig_! Why don't you just fuck off?"

Ludwig grabbed his brother's shirt collar, "Why do you always have to do this? Why are you so damn difficult to talk to? Act fucking civilized, you dumb-ass!" Gilbert punched his brother's face, "Don't you _ever_ talk to me that way!" Ludwig let go of Gilbert to hold his hurting face. Feliciano went up to him and Katyusha was confused as to what to do.

Gilbert didn't really want to hit his brother, but he went too far. He hadn't hit his brother like that in years. Ludwig stood up straight, "Gilbert, you have _issues_! This is why people always have problems with you!" Gilbert gave him a cold stare, "Is that so?" He walked away, with Katyusha following behind.

"Ludwig, are you okay?"

Ludwig fell to his knees and covered his face with his fists, "I can't believe it…what have I done?" Feliciano hugged his friend, "I'm sorry…" "About what?" "If I never said anything, you wouldn't have yelled at Gil…" Ludwig slowly put an arm around his friend, "Don't…don't worry about it. You did nothing wrong. It was all my fault. I kept arguing and arguing with him and…I can't believe I said those things to him! I'm the one with issues! What have I done?"

Feliciano didn't know what to say. He could only hold his best friend closer.


	5. Broken on a Team

A few weeks after their confrontation, Gilbert and Ludwig tried to avoid each other as much as they could. Gilbert kept on waking earlier than his brother and wore longer sleeves since he was starting to cut himself more. Ludwig was getting more depressed because he didn't know how to deal with the whole situation.

Gilbert also avoided his friends when he could and hung out with Yekaterina more often. Whenever rumors about them being a couple arose, the both of them tried to dismiss them. Ludwig also tried, to an extent. He didn't want to believe that his brother was dating Ivan's sister. When Feliciano asked if he hated her, Ludwig said that he didn't but that he simply blames her for Gilbert's attitude change.

Feliciano believes that it's jealousy.

Opa Beilschmidt was not unaware of this. Whenever he would arrive early for dinner, Ludwig would lightly tap on Gilbert's door for him to join them. Of course, he wouldn't get out, so Ludwig would tell his grandfather that Gilbert wasn't in there or that he was in a deep sleep. He knew there was a problem with his grandsons if Ludwig had to lie to him, but he was afraid he'd make it worse like the last time.

The vice principal was sitting inside his office staring at his papers. "What am I going to do?" he said, closing his eyes and putting his hand on his head. As soon as he opened his eyes, the principal's face was directly in front of his, "Ciao~!" He screamed and almost fell out of his chair.

"What in the hell is wrong with you, Vargas? We're too old for this!"

Mr. Vargas pouted, "Aww, you don't have to be so mean! Isn't the school principal allowed to see how his vice principal is doing?" Said vice principal composed himself and cleared his throat, "As you can see I'm fine, so…shouldn't you be going back to your work now?" He smiled, "I'm taking a break." "Good for you. Now, if you excuse me."

The principal crossed his arms and looked at his friend and at his meager paperwork, "Amazing! You really got a lot done!" Beilschmidt blushed a little, "Well, I'm glad you noticed all of the work I've done. It wasn't very easy, I'll tell you that much!"

"Hey, have you been staying in your office later than usual?"

He looked up, "What do you mean?" Vargas moved in closer to him, "Well, you usually complain that you have a lot of work to do and try to throw me out!" He stood up, "Now you notice such things?" "I know you like to catch up on your work and everything, but to stay here so late…is everything alright at home?"

Beilschmidt frowned, "Why would there be anything wrong with me doing my work? If anything, you should be following my example!" Vargas gave him a serious look, "Weren't _you_ the one who told me that you wanted to be closer to Ludwig and Gilbert and try to at least be home with them as much as possible?"

He was surprised. Mr. Vargas actually remembered something he said? He could've sworn that when he told him that his Italian friend was too busy with a jar of olives. "N-nothing too bad…just difficult teen age stuff and…that's all." His friend raised an eyebrow, "That's all?"

"I…I just don't know how to handle these kids! Especially Gilbert! Old Frederich knew how to handle that boy better than anybody else. Better than his own grandfather…" Vargas sighed and gave a sly smile while putting his arm around his friend, "I know just what you need~!"

Beilschmidt narrowed his eyes, "Okay?" He pulled out a pamphlet, "You should go to this place! You'll get to stay in a nice hotel a few towns over, relax *coughtoacertainextentcough*, and meet with some nice people!" It sounded too good to be true, so he snatched pamphlet and read it.

"This is the annual school district meeting! I knew something didn't sound right! You're supposed to go to this!"

Vargas pouted again, "But I don't want to! It's so boring and the people there are so serious!" He looked Beilschmidt in the eyes, "And you won't be there…" The vice principal quickly turned away, "If I go I won't be _here_ , smart ass." "You're so mean! I was just trying to be nice you!"

As the principal sulked, Beilschmidt stared at the pamphlet, "Well, I guess I might get the chance to get away for awhile…"

…

After school that same day, Francis was walking from the school's baseball field after talking with the advisor. On his way back, he saw Gilbert and someone who looked like a baseball player talking. Upon closer inspection, they were fiercely arguing. It wasn't until the baseball player gripped onto the bat he was holding that Francis ran over and slammed the boy into a nearby wall.

"What the hell is going on over here?"

Gilbert was stunned that his friend came out of nowhere, yet thankful. The baseball player was about to pick up his dropped bat when Gilbert kicked it away, "Get the fuck out of my sight, you bastard! Tell the rest of those assholes that I'm NOT COMING BACK!" The kid ran off yelling, "You're making a big mistake, Beilschmidt!"

Gilbert sighed and leaned against the wall. When he looked up, Francis was glaring at him, "What, is there something on my face?" Francis pinned him against the wall, "Tell me what that was all about, Gilbert." "Or what? You'll start cursing at me in French again?"

Francis smiled and backed away, "Why, no! Why would I ever do that to my dear Gilbert?" He chuckled, "Never stopped you last time." They laughed for a while until Francis put his hand on Gilbert's face, "Please, won't you tell me why? What's so wrong with me knowing? It might not be as big of a problem as you think."

Gilbert turned away, "Why does it matter?" "Because you're my friend and so is Antonio. No matter how much we hate each other, we…so will you not tell us?" Gilbert sighed, "Would it make any difference if I tell you?" "Actually, it would." Gilbert looked down and then back to face him, "Fine, but just you."

"Are you sure?"

Antonio came around the corner and smiled. "How the hell did you know where we were?" Antonio held up his phone to show a text message Francis sent, "Things happen when you look away, Gil~!" "I only turned away for two seconds!" Antonio walked up to Gilbert and grabbed his hands, "Por favor, Gilbert?"

He sighed, "I guess you guys won't leave me alone if I don't, right?" Francis' patience was wearing thin, "Just tell us already! It's not like you were gang raped by the whole team...Holy shit! You were! You _were_ gang raped by the whole team, Gilbert! I'm so sorry!" He hugged a completely dazed and motionless Gilbert. Antonio pulled them apart, "Please, just start with the story already…"

Gilbert sat on the ground and sighed, "Okay…well, do you remember the reason why I chose baseball?" They shrugged. "Old Fritz loved the game, so what better way to cope with his…death than play the game he loved? Even though Opa didn't like the idea of me being out in the sun for so long, he didn't really protest too much."

Antonio nodded, "Yeah, you being albino and all. You usually burn up in the sun after too long. It's a good thing baseball uniforms cover up most of your skin!" Gilbert gave him an exasperated look, "Thanks, Toni. That was a real necessary thing to say…and I'm not albino! I'm just too awesome to tan!" "Just get on with it, Gilbert!" Francis yelled.

Gilbert frowned, "Fine…you guys know that I became a great batter over time, so there was no doubt I'd be the star player by high school. Unfortunately, last year was also the year that the sophomore Ivan Braginsky joined the team. I was a little familiar with him before then, but once he was on the team…he never left me alone!"

"When he joined the team, everybody was afraid of him! That giant Russian pretty much took control of the whole team and he wasn't even the captain or the manager! The reason no one ever did anything about Ivan, despite him being a fucking psychopath and all, was that he was the best fucking pitcher we had! I don't know if it was because I was the only one who didn't take any of his shit, but he was always on me!"

"No matter where I was or what I did, he would always be there. He was just out to get me for no reason and it really pissed me off. And then things took a turn for the worse and he did the worst thing anyone has ever done to me. I don't know what was wrong with Ivan that day, but he was NOT in a good mood!"

…

Gilbert was in the locker room changing into him uniform when Ivan walked in. Instead of his signature perpetual smile, Ivan had a deep, dark frown on his face. "You're a little late!" Ivan looked away, "Sorry." Gilbert scoffed, "What was that? You know, it would've been better if you didn't show up at all."

"Не понимаю…"

"Huh?"

"Why do you hate me so?"

Ivan walked up face to face with Gilbert, but he backed away, "W-what? Why not? You won't leave me the hell alone, that's why!" In that split second, Ivan's hand grabbed Gilbert's neck and slammed him against the lockers, "Why is that a problem? There is no reason for you to hate me, so why? Why are you so stupid? Why don't you understand me? Why doesn't anybody…"

At that moment, Gilbert honestly feared for his life. As Ivan's face moved closer to his, the manager walked in, "Is anybody still in here?" He walked more inside and saw Ivan and Gilbert on opposite sides of each other, "The two of you are needed on the field right now, so hurry up!" Gilbert made sure he ran out first.

All of the players on the team noticed that Ivan's pitching was very erratic. He kept missing or almost hitting them. Immediately they all looked to Gilbert, who told them he didn't know anything and that it wasn't his fault. When it was Gilbert's turn to bat, he could feel the Russian's cold eyes burning deep into his soul. Not that he was a particularly poetic person, but he felt had no other way to describe the feeling.

Unfortunately for Gilbert, all Ivan could see was red. He first pitch flung right pass the batter's face, "H-hey! Damn it, Ivan! Watch it!" Ivan didn't say anything and threw the ball two more times, Gilbert tapping the ball on the second throw. _What the hell is wrong with fat ass? Is he trying to kill me?_ Gilbert thought.

Ivan made sure that the next pitch he made was a strong one, so he threw the ball as hard as he could. What resulted was the sound of a loud crack and a scream. That scream snapped Ivan out of his daze and before he knew what happened he saw a group of guys surrounding Gilbert. He walked over and looked down to see Gilbert grabbing his limp arm with tears in his eyes.

"Gilbert, are you alright?"

Gilbert looked up and saw Ivan's face. From his low angle it appeared as if Ivan had a slight grin on his face, "Stay the hell away from me, you bastard!" Ivan crouched down and Gilbert fearfully backed away, "S-stay the hell away!" "But why?" "Why?" The look of slight concern on the other's face pissed off Gilbert.

"What the fuck do you think happened? You threw that fucking ball at me and broke my arm, you asshole! What the hell is wrong with you?"

Ivan frowned and touched his arm, "Don't fucking touch me! Please someone get him the hell away from me!" Two team members helped Gilbert up and walked off to get some help. Ivan tried to follow, but the rest of the team blocked his way. They all gave Ivan looks of disdain, making him turn away.

…

Francis covered his mouth, "Merde…that's terrible!" Antonio hugged Gilbert, "Is that why you hate Ivan so much?" Gilbert pulled away, "Actually, it get's worse…" "Worse?" Francis stood up, "How could it get any worse?" Gilbert sighed and mumbled, "It just does…"

…

A month later, Gilbert returned to the team. As he entered the locker room, the team looked completely surprised, "Grüß dich! You guys miss me?" The members gave each other uneasy looks until the captain stood up, "B-Beilschmidt, you didn't say you'd be back!" Gilbert laughed.

"Kesese, you didn't think I'd be out of commission for that long, did you? After my arm healed, the doctor said I couldn't overstrain my arm right away, but who cares? I waited long enough! Your star batter is back and…"

Gilbert scanned around the room, completely ignoring the glares he was getting, "Where's the giant Russian?" The captain walked up to Gilbert, "Beilschmidt, we need to ta-" "Fat ass left? Awesome! Now I don't have to worry about him harassing me and breaking my arm again!" "Beilschmidt!" Gilbert was getting annoyed, "What? Can't I be glad that the person you all seemed to have feared is gone now?"

"That's our best pitcher you're talking about!"

Gilbert was completely taken aback. He finally noticed all of the angry looks he was getting, "Okay, someone better tell me what in the hell happened while I was gone!" The captain crossed his arms, "Gladly! While you were gone, Braginsky quit. Up and left us in the middle of an important game!" "Wow, what an asshole…so _what_ was your problem with what I said?"

"He left because of you!"

Gilbert was speechless for awhile before laughing again, "Oh yeah! Real funny, dick! So what makes you think he left because of me?" "He said so." He rose an eyebrow, "W-what? Ridiculous! You guys shouldn't be pissed off at me!" "Why not?" another player spoke up. The captain nodded.

"That's right! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find another player as good as Braginsky? It didn't matter how scared we were of him as long as he played and kept us winning!"

Gilbert backed away a bit, "No way…w-what are you guys trying to say?" The captain cracked a smile, "You know, when Ivan broke your arm I was a little scared. We started losing a few games and I thought there couldn't be anybody who was better than Gilbert 'The Awesome' Beilschmidt. But you know what, I was wrong! There are plenty of other batters than you! Even better! I realized that you're nothing special. Sure, you're good, but it was Braginsky who had real talent! And if it wasn't for you…"

Everybody in the room was glaring at Gilbert, "You…you can't be serious…that's just what you think! You other guys can't seriously be agreeing with what he said!" No one answered back. He couldn't believe that all the players who admired him and encouraged him had turned against him. Gilbert started to shake. He wanted to run away as far as he could, but his pride wouldn't let him. Instead, his pride made him speak up.

"Fine! You assholes want a pitcher I'll give you a pitcher! It…it can't be as hard as you pricks make it out to be! Aha ha ha ha ha!"

The past two weeks were hell for Gilbert. Pitching was not his best talent and the rest of the team let him know it. They didn't try to help him at all and only encouraged him to give up. Whenever he asked if there was still a place for him batting again he would only get laughs.

So, at the end of the second week after practice, Gilbert purposely threw the ball at the captain. Unfortunately, he missed and the whole team laughed at him again. "That fucking tears it! I QUIT!" The team captain sighed, "Beilschmidt, don't pussy out. You may be a shitty pitcher, but maybe some of that shitty luck of yours will rub off on the opposing team!" Once again, the team laughed.

"Verpiss dich!"

"What?"

Gilbert threw his hat and glove down on the ground and flipped them off, "I said piss off and all you guys can kiss my ass!" He walked off and made sure no one could see his face.

…

Gilbert covered his face with his knees. Francis and Antonio were furious, "What the fuck?" Francis ran his fingers through his hair, "I…cannot believe such people! How could they get away with such bullying? And they had the nerve to ask you back? If I was in the student council last year, I would have done something about-" "Don't bother…" Francis and Antonio looked at each other, "What do you mean?"

"Don't bother with those jerks. It's not like I was going to join the team again. No…my real problem is with Ivan."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Antonio immediately said. Francis agreed, "What does _he_ have anything to do with the whole baseball team shunning my Gilbert?" He held out his hand to help Gilbert up, but he slapped his hand away.

"I knew you guys wouldn't understand!"

"What are you…"

"If it wasn't for that fat ass Ivan, my arm would've been fine and the team wouldn't have been forced to replace me! Not to mention the hazing I got from them because he told them that _I_ was the reason he quit!"

Gilbert stood up and turned away, but Antonio grabbed his arm, "Why was it your fault he quit?" "Let go of me!" Francis touched Antonio's back and he let go of his friend's arm, "Gilbert…my Gilbert…yes, Ivan did cause your arm to be injured, but that does _not_ excuse what that team did to you!"

Francis stared at Gilbert for awhile until the other looked away, "Like I said, I knew you guys just wouldn't understand…all this talk is making me more pissed off at Ivan." He walked away and Francis was completely confused, "He blames Ivan Braginsky for all that happened? Ç'est rien que de la merde!"

Antonio tapped his friend's shoulder, "Franny, there's still something I don't understand!" "That's a shocker…anyways, what is it?" Antonio puffed out his cheeks, "I'm serious! Do you really think Ivan quit because of Gilbert? Why would it be his fault?"

"Unbelievable!" Francis pinched himself and then Antonio, "Hey! Don't pinch my butt!" "N-non, uh…I was just a little surprised that you, Antonio, caught on to something that _I_ did not!" He crossed his arms, "Damn it, Francis! I'm not stupid…can you try not to be such an ass and listen to me for once?"

Francis covered his mouth, "Oh my! Do you kiss your Lovino with that mouth?" Antonio started to walk away, but Francis pulled him back, "Tonio, je suis désolé! Forgive me?" He sighed and smiled, "Of course! Will you take what I said seriously now?" Francis nuzzled his friend's cheek, "When have I not?"

Francis really did take what his Spanish friend said into consideration. _Ivan was the one who broke Gilbert's arm, so why was it Gilbert's fault that he quit_? It made no sense to Francis or Antonio.


	6. Influential Brawling

The next morning, Ludwig woke up relatively early. Since he was ahead of schedule, he decided to cook some wurst along with his usual eggs and toast. He knew that his brother would've left early, but he still checks if Gilbert overslept at times.

He quietly opened his brother's door and looked inside. Unfortunately for Gilbert, he was still in his bed. Ludwig couldn't help but smile because it's been awhile since they woke up at the same time. Sadly he knew that if he did wake him up things would go very awkward very fast.

Ludwig quickly went back in the kitchen and fried up a little more wurst and then went back to his brother, "Bruder! Bruder, wake up!" He tried shaking his brother awake, feeling nervous the whole time. "No…I can't…" Gilbert mumbled and shifted around.

When he moved, he exposed a bit of his wrist. Ludwig shook Gilbert harder and glanced down. He was only able to see a few red lines before Gilbert moved his arm to wipe his eyes, "Wh-what's wrong?" Ludwig looked away, "It's…you're late, Bruder."

Gilbert looked at the time and punched his clock onto to ground, "I'll get up in five minutes…" Ludwig sighed and left to eat his breakfast. Ten minutes later, Gilbert staggered out of his room and saw his brother leaving the bathroom, "Ah, I accidently made too much food, so you can have what's left!"

Ludwig was a terrible liar and Gilbert knew it. His food was already prepared on a plate and everything. That was some accident. As Gilbert ate, Ludwig was leaving out the front door, "I'll…see you at school…" Once he closed the door, he leaned against it.

"That was okay, right?"

A couple minutes after that, Gilbert was ready and out the door. He still couldn't believe that he woke up so late! He imagined Katyusha must've been waiting for him, yet he was also angry that she didn't call him for being so late. He didn't even have time to pick out a decent long sleeve shirt, so he had to find a pair of long sweat bands to cover his wrists. It didn't really cover all of the scars, but it was enough.

The truth was that Gilbert actually felt a lot better after talking with his friends about the whole baseball thing. It was as if a huge weight got lifted from him. He felt so good that he only cut himself once that day, mostly because it had become such a routine thing for him now.

…

Once he made it to school, he started looking for Katyusha. He caught the sight of Berwald and walked up to him, "Hey, Waldy! Long time no see!" Berwald noticeably frowned, "Don't call m-" "Uh huh. So, how the hell are you this morning?" Berwald looked away. "Aw, don't tell me you're still a little sour about what I said all those weeks ago, are ya?"

Berwald motioned Gilbert with eyes to look down. When he did, he saw a very pissed off Finnish boy. "Oh, didn't notice you over there…Tino, right?" Tino forced a smile, "Syö paskaa ja kuole." Berwald looked at Tino with shock, or as much as it appeared on his face. Gilbert looked confused, "Huh? What was that?"

Tino smiled again, "Oh, it's nothing, vitun kusipää!" Gilbert looked at Berwald's somewhat changed expression, "I don't know what you just said, but this is exactly what I mean! Berry, you have _got_ to choose better people to be with!"

"Haista vittu!"

Tino grabbed Berwald's hand and walked away. The Swedish boy thought that in some ways the polite Tino _was_ a bad influence at times like this. Gilbert shrugged and continued on his journey. He didn't see her by the classroom, so he thought she might be somewhere near the old school building.

Yekaterina was waiting for Gilbert by on a tree near that same old building. She was wondering why he was late and considered calling him, but believed he would yell at her if she did that. She heard someone coming closer to her, "Gilbert?"

"Сестра~!"

Ivan hugged his older sister tightly, "V-Vanya! When did you g-get here?" He smiled, "Just now!" Yekaterina narrowed her eyes, "H-how did you know I was here?" Ivan pulled away, "Oh, I just asked around!" "I-I see…"

Ivan grabbed her shoulders, "What are you doing all the way out here? Are you waiting for someone?" She looked away, "No one in particular…just Gi-" "Gilbert, da?" She frowned, "How did you know?" Ivan sighed, "Katyusha, how could I not? Everybody talks about you and Gilbert being together all the time! I mean, more people talk about you and him than Gilbert being with anyone else!"

"Vanya, what are you getting at?"

He squeezed her shoulders, "I am very upset with you. Why is it that I have to hear about these things from other people? Do you not trust your own brother?" He squeezed harder, "Vanya, you're hurting me!" He put his hands in the air and she turned away, "Vanya…I don't think I _can_ trust you if you do things like this…"

Ivan was confused, "Things like what?" She rubbed her shoulders, "Giving me this interrogation! Why are you so jealous, Vanya?" Ivan frowned, "It's…it's not jealousy. I'm just worried about you, that's all. I don't want anything to happen to you!" He hugged her again, "Vanya…"

"I just want to protect you like you protected me back then!"

She pushed him off, "Ivan, I told you to stop thinking about that! That was then and this is now…you need to stop thinking that everything needs to be paid back!" He looked away. "Vanya, I didn't tell you anything because there is nothing _to_ tell. Nothing is going between me and Gilbert." Ivan grabbed his sister's chin and forced her head up.

"Stay away from Gilbert! You have _no_ idea what kind of person he is! Do _not_ get close to him! If you do…you will…"

"What the hell are you doing?"

Gilbert shoved Ivan away from his sister, inadvertently causing Katyusha to fall down. "Gilbert, you're so rough!" Ivan jokingly said as he tried to reach over to his sister. Gilbert blocked him, "What the hell is wrong with you? She's your sister!" Gilbert pulled her up and apologized, Ivan taking note of it.

"Gil, what is relationship with my older sister?"

Katyusha opened her mouth, but Gilbert stopped her, "What's it to you? Is that what you were talking with her about?" Ivan smiled, "I asked you first. And that is family business, so it is none of your concern." "You were talking about me, so yes, it does concern me!"

Ivan sighed and pushed Gilbert aside, "Gil Gil, it is much too early for this, so will you please go away until another time?" Gilbert pushed Ivan's shoulder, "I am so over your bullshit, Braginski! I am going to settle my shit with you right now!" Gilbert pulled on Ivan's scarf and squeezed harder before the other could retaliate.

"Gilbert!"

Katyusha freaked out that Gilbert was trying to choke her brother, and with the scarf she gave him no less! Ivan slowly grabbed Gilbert's face and threw him back. Gilbert looked around and noticed that there was a little crowd around them.

"I guess you're right. It _is_ too early!"

Ivan fixed his scarf, "I see you understand." Gilbert walked up to him, "No, we will settle this afterschool!" Ivan rose an eyebrow, "Oh, you wanna fight after school in the school yard, Gil Gil? Or would you prefer we fight at the bicycle racks? Better make sure there aren't any teachers around!" As Ivan laughed, Gilbert smiled, "Sure! But I prefer the baseball field!"

Ivan frowned, "You are…serious?" "Hell yeah I am!" Ivan put his hand on his face, "Gilbert, we do not have any reason to fight!" Gilbert flipped him off, "You might not have a reason to fight me 'cause you're an asshole, but I sure as hell have a reason to fight you!"

Ivan looked to his sister, but she didn't seem to convey any positive feelings, "I…I guess if that's what Gilbert wants, I…I will fight you afterschool…" "Today! This afternoon at the baseball field!" Ivan's frown deepened, "Why there?" Gilbert walked away, "Because that's the place I hate the most."

…

At lunch, Gilbert sat across from Francis and Antonio. As he ate, the two of them stared at Gilbert expectedly, "So…is there something on my face?" They didn't say anything. "Oh! This is about yesterday, isn't it?" They looked at each other and Francis talked first, "Well, we _were_ going to talk to you about that, but…"

Gilbert smiled, "That's great because there's really nothing to talk about!" Antonio slammed his fist on the table, "Why are you fighting Ivan?" Gilbert got surprised, "Seriously? Damn, word gets around hella fast in this mo-" "Gilbert! Why are you doing this?" Francis pled.

Gilbert crossed his arms, "Why not? It's been a long time coming! Now I'll finally be able to settle things with that fat fuck!" As he laughed, Francis had to cover his face with both hands, "I swear I just do not understand him, Antonio!" "Gilbert, why d-"

"Gilbert, I need to talk to you!"

Yekaterina yelled from behind Gilbert, so he turned to her, "Hey Kat! What you wanna talk about?" "I…uh…" She suddenly got nervous and looked away. Gilbert turned back around and saw that Francis and Antonio were glaring at her. "Hey, what's the matter with you guys?"

Francis put a deep frown on his face and looked away, "I am sorry for my rude behavior, Yekaterina, but are you not the reason Gilbert has to fight your brother after school today?" "I…I don't…" Gilbert stood up, "That doesn't matter! Like I said, I've wanted to do this for a long time!" Antonio moved in closer.

"So, is _she_ your excuse for fighting him today?"

Gilbert grabbed his lunch, "You wanted to talk to me, ja? Let's go." He walked away with Katyusha. Antonio looked worried, "Has he always been like this? Something seems…different about Gilbert!" Francis groaned, "No, our Gilbert is still pretty much the same, but I know what you mean. It's more like he's hiding something from us and that girl definitely has something to do with it."

Yekaterina led Gilbert to an area with less people. "Okay, here is good." Gilbert quickly tried to finish off the rest of his food, "Okay, so…what do you want?" She grabbed on to Gilbert's free hand, "Gilbert, please…" Gilbert looked down at his hand and then to the ground, "Look, I know that I'm an unbelievably handsome guy and you're pretty hot too, I guess, but I don't really li-"

"Please don't fight my little brother!"

"…huh?"

She gave him pleading eyes, "Please don't fight Vanya! If…if you're doing this because of me…" "Hell no, I'm not doing this for you!" She slowly let go of his hand, "Th-th-then…" Gilbert sighed, "Fine then! Tell me why I shouldn't beat his ass!" Katyusha cracked a small smile, "Thank you. Well…okay."

She let out a deep breath, "I guess I could start from the beginning…you see, when we were still kids, Vanya, I mean, Ivan always got in trouble with my mother. I never understood why she didn't like him so much because no matter what happened she would always blame him for it and hit him. He would run to me every time and cry, so one day when he accidently dropped and broke a good plate I got in front on him and my mother hit me. I told her that she could hit me instead of Ivan every time, so she did. It devastated my brother and he vowed he'd protect me from then on."

"My father eventually left my mother and took Ivan with him. Oddly enough, she never hit me as much after they left. My father moved away, so it would take about 6 years when my father got custody of my sister and I that we were able to see Ivan again! Unfortunately, Ivan had almost completely changed by then. There was something almost creepy about him and it was difficult to be around him again. For some reason, Natas-Natalia became really attached to him, but for me…"

"Well, when I was a freshman and join the agriculture club, I needed a lot of money for a project. Unfortunately, I didn't have a lot of money and my father wouldn't give me any telling me that I need to earn my money and get a job. Ivan over heard and told me he would give me any amount as long as I paid him back once the project was done. Apparently, my father gave Ivan a lot of money and he saved it over the years for a reason I don't know about."

"But…the project fell through and…so, now I owe him all this money and…and…I got a job and everything, but he constantly harasses me about how much he wants his money back! I don't blame him, but sometimes, he's like an intense bill collector and charges me interest and I have to hide from him sometimes! My father doesn't know that I owe Ivan money, but he did find out about the job and forces me to pay some of the bills and now I don't have much money for myself and…and…"

Yekaterina looks at Gilbert and he appeared to be asleep, "Gilbert!" "Huh? What? I'm awake!" He slowly straightened himself out and yawned, "So…you done?" She glared, "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?" Gilbert wiped his eyes, "Yeah, what the hell! You didn't tell me you got a job! Pony up, bitch!"

"Gilbert! What I'm trying to say is, Vanya completely changed after he lived with my father, so it's not his fault that he's like this! I finally realized after what he told me this morning!"

Gilbert pouted, "So what?" "What do y-" "Was it _really_ your father's fault that your brother turned into such a dick? I mean, even if it was, it was his choice to continue acting that way!" Katyusha held on to her sleeve, "Please don't fight my brother…"

Gilbert gave her a sad smile, "I'm sorry…you're a good big sister, you know that? I know how you feel, but…sorry. I really need to settle this thing with him…" Gilbert tried to walk away, but she grabbed his arm. He pulled his arm away, before she takes off his sweat band, and tried not to look at her as he left.

…

It was finally after school and Ivan was walking towards the field when he was stopped by Toris, Eduard, and Raivis. "What do you three want?" Ivan said with a grin. Toris stepped up, "I-Ivan, please don't do this!" Ivan gave a confused look, "Why?" "Why? Why not? You don't have any reason to fight Gilbert!"

Ivan smiled again, "This is what Gilbert wants so I will give it to him." Eduard stepped up next, "Y-you will get in b-big trouble! What if the teachers catch you? It'll be on your record!" Ivan stopped smiling, "Why do you care so much?" "Well, I…" The three looked at each other until Raivis spoke up.

"I-I-If you g-g-get in trouble, wh-what will happen t-to us?"

"What?"

"If…if you get in trouble, we'll be blamed by associ-"

Eduard quickly covered his friend's mouth, "Wh-wh-what he means is…we all care about you!" Ivan looked surprised, completely missing what Raivis could've said, "You…care about me?" Toris nodded, "Y-yes sir! In our own unique _individual_ way, we care about you, so please don't fight him!"

Ivan flashed a smile of real concern, which Raivis noticed with a shudder, before walking toward the field again, "If I don't do this now, Gil will hate me even more!" The trio followed him and Eduard spoke quietly, "But can't you guys settle this off of school grounds?"

Gilbert was waiting for Ivan to show up. His friends still tried to convince him out of it after lunch and he even tried to avoid Ludwig before he would ask any questions. Gilbert wanted to do this. He wanted all of this to be over and he believed that fighting Ivan was the best solution.

He stood at the pitcher's mound with his arms crossed. Beside him was Yekaterina and further away was some spectators waiting to see the long awaited fight. Ivan walked up with a concerned look on his face, "Must we do this, Gilbert?" "Hell yeah, we are!"

"Gil, if this…if this is about what happened last year, can I please explain w-"

"Even if you tell me your reasons behind it, would that change the fact that you broke my arm?"

"…no, it wouldn't."

"Heh, I thought so…"

Ivan looked down and then back up, "I ca-" Gilbert punched his nose as hard as he could, causing the other to stumble, "Damn, I've been waiting to do that, like, forever!" There was an audible grasp in the crowd and several students moved to get in closer.

Ivan slowly moved his hand from his nose, "You…made me bleed so much…why?" Gilbert smiled, "Because I hate your fucking guts, that's why!" As he laughed, Ivan punched him in his stomach. "Gilbert!" Ivan was surprised to hear his sister yell out Gilbert's name, "Katyusha, why…?"

From the ground, Gilbert grabbed onto Ivan's scarf, which he forgot to take off beforehand, and tried to pull him down to him. Ivan grabbed Gilbert's head and punched him down. As Gilbert looked up from below, he noticed that Ivan had a very creepy smile on his face that made Gilbert want to run away, but instead he tackled the Russian to the ground.

Gilbert rolled on top of Ivan and repeatedly punched him. In the crowd, Feliciano and Ludwig were watching, "Ludwig, you gotta tell Gil to stop!" Ludwig wanted to stop his brother, but something about seeing his brother beating down the other boy made him feel somewhat impressed.

Feliciano tugged on Ludwig's shirt, "Ludwig! Aren't you going to do something?" Ludwig kept staring with his mouth slightly open and his fists balled up, unconsciously encouraging his brother. When Ivan grabbed on Gilbert's neck, Ludwig yelled out a bit, "Bruder!" "Yes, let's go to him, Ludwig! Come on!"

Ivan punched Gilbert off of him, "Gil, if you wanted to get on top of me so bad all you had to do was ask!" "Shut up!" Gilbert wobbled up and tried to punch him again, but Ivan easily dodged it and held on to his neck again as Gilbert repeatedly kicked him. "Roderich, we need to help him!" Elizabeta, also in the crowd of spectators, said while tugged on him. Before Roderich could say anything, a shout came from the crowd.

"The teachers are coming! Everyone, the teachers are here!"

Everyone, except for the brawlers, ran and scattered away before any of the teachers saw them. Ludwig finally took that time to try get to his brother, but Feliciano pulled him away because they would get in big trouble if they stayed.

It took two administrators to hold down Gilbert and several more for Ivan. Because Yekaterina was the only other person around, as she was uncontrollably crying, a teacher tried to calm her down and took her in along with the other two for questions and statements.


	7. The Winner?

After the school nurse had taken care of their wounds, Gilbert and Ivan were spoken to by administrators before being taken to the vice principal's office. Of course, Gilbert was already dreading the whole meeting. As he stepped in the room, he was greeted by Ivan's half smile and his grandfather's frown. Said grandfather was standing beside a window, staring out.

Gilbert and his grandfather sat down at the same time with the same expression on their face. _They truly are related to each other,_ Ivan thought to himself. "Do you two fully understand why you are in my office right now?" Vice Principal Beilschmidt said. Gilbert wanted to say that it was a stupid question since the only reason he would be specifically in his office was because they're related, but didn't want to get in more trouble.

After a long lecture and a punishment of a two week home suspension, the two were dismissed. "Gilbert!" Gilbert stopped but didn't turn around, "What?" Opa Beilschmidt opened up his drawer and looked inside, "Tell your brother that I have something important to tell the both of you tonight." Gilbert nodded and left.

Gilbert walked into the hall and purposely walked past a waiting Ludwig. "Bruder, please wait!" Gilbert sighed and turned around, "Whaaaaat, West?" Ludwig drew back a little after looking at his brother's face. Gilbert had various bruises and bandages on his face and a particularly bad mark on his neck. Even so, Ludwig continued, "Why…why did you…"

"Were you watching me?"

"What does th-"

"What the hell are you even doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at practice right now?"

Ludwig looked away, "I-I was just worried…" "When will you learn to just stay out of my business!" Ludwig got angry, "What do you mean? I can't believe you'd do something as recklessly stupid as fight someone in school! Have you no shame?"

Gilbert smirked, "Don't think I didn't notice you there. From what I could tell, you seemed perfectly fine just watching from sidelines! Worried my ass!" Gilbert turned away, "Gramps wants to see us tonight…" He walked away, leaving a disappointed Ludwig.

…

After getting home, Gilbert ran straight to his room and immediately tore up a couple of his shirts and then threw his head down on his pillow and screamed. He sat up and started pulling at his hair, "Why…why? Why, damn it! Why? Why do I still feel like shit after having done what I finally wanted to do? I don't fucking get it!" Gilbert started rubbing his eyes hard, "And why can't I cry when I actually want to, damn it!"

Gilbert reached into his dresser and pulled out a razor blade and held out his left arm. Unfortunately, his left wrist was full of several scars from previous cuts and when he looked at his right wrist it was the same, "Damn, I guess I went a little overboard…"

None the less, Gilbert cut his upper arm several times, waiting for all of his pain to bleed away. Several hours and many unanswered phone calls later, Ludwig knocked on Gilbert's door, "Gilbert, Grandfather is here." Gilbert woke up with a sigh.

The three ate their meal in relative silence, but Opa Beilschmidt was determined to end it once again, "Ludwig, do you have any idea what your older brother did in school today?" Gilbert instantly dropped his fork. "Your brother got into a senseless fist fight with another boy on the baseball field! A boy in your own grade!"

Gilbert slammed his fists on the table, "I did _not_ start it!" "That doesn't matter!" Ludwig could only shrink in his seat as the tension got worse. "Damn it, Gilbert! Do you have any idea how foolish you've made your entire family look? How poorly this will reflect on all of us? How do you think your older brothers will feel when they hear about this?"

"I don't give a damn about what they think! Not like they live here and not like they care."

"Of course your brothers care! Just like I do! I'm the damn vice principal, Gilbert! What will people say now that my own grandson was fighting, in _my_ school no less?"

Gilbert growled, "What the hell does that have to do with me?" Opa could do nothing but put his hands on his face, "Ludwig, Ludwig. _Please_ do not follow after your brother's example!" Ludwig gave a little grunt, but Gilbert laughed bitterly.

"Gilbert, what do you find so funny in all of this?"

Gilbert gave a huge smirk, "I just find it funny that you think West wouldn't know about any of this!" His grandfather raised an eyebrow, "Well, I must imagine word gets around fast and judging from your bruises…" Ludwig finally caught on, "Gilbert! Don't!"

"Kesesese, little Ludwig over here skipped practice to watch the fight!"

"Damn it, Gilbert!"

Opa Beilschmidt slammed his hands on the table and stood up, "Did you just swear, Ludwig?" Ludwig opened his mouth, but was interrupted, "Is what your brother said true? Did you actually skip practice just to watch a fight?" "No! I mean, not…I…" Opa was getting angrier, "How _dare_ you lie to me, Ludwig! I raised you better than that! Do you always skip practice to watch fights?"

"Wh-what? No!"

Gilbert finished the rest of his food and stood up, "Well, if that's all you wanted to say to me then I'd best be on my way." "Sit down, Gilbert! That's not the only thing I needed to talk to you about." Gilbert sat back down with a huff, "Okay, so what?" He tried to ignore Gilbert's attitude and began, "Actually, this has to do with the both of you." Ludwig looked up, but couldn't face his grandfather.

Said grandfather took out a pamphlet from his pocket, "Starting next week, I will be at the school district's annual meeting out of town." Ludwig and Gilbert looked at each other, "Next week?" He nodded, "I will leave Sunday evening." Ludwig mumbled, "F-for how long?"

Opa Beilschmidt breathed in and then out, "I will be gone for three days. A whole week if it comes to that. That being said, since Gilbert's suspension starts Friday, which is tomorrow, I won't be here for most of it." Gilbert gave a poorly hid smile, "Oh, I see. That shouldn't be a problem. I'm sure we'll be fine!"

Ludwig's frown grew and his grandfather sighed, "Of course, this means that the both of you will be grounded until I come back." Gilbert stood up, "What the hell, old man? What the hell did I…oh…" Gilbert sat down and pouted, but Ludwig was still upset and accidently blurted out, "Why me too?"

Both Gilbert and his grandfather were surprised by Ludwig's unexpected outburst, "Why you? Instead of getting administrators and breaking up the fight, you just stood there watching your older brother get beaten up!" "Beat _his_ ass…" Gilbert quickly mumbled before his grandfather grabbed his arm, startling him.

"Ludwig, look at your brother. Look at him! Look at all the bruises on him. Look at all the cuts! Look at his arm! I barely touch it and it's bleeding again. You could've prevented this if you did something other than spectate!"

Gilbert's eyes got wide and his heart started beating faster as he thought that at first his grandfather knew the real reason how he got the cuts on his upper arm. Ludwig looked away and felt crushed with shame and disappointment and his grandfather let go of Gilbert's arm, "Along with being grounded, you boys are _not_ to have any guests over unless I send for one."

Gilbert immediately snapped out of his daze, "No way, old man! You can't seriously expect me to spend a whole week alone in here with _Ludwig_?" Said younger brother was too depressed to react. "No, three weeks." "Damn it!" "And if any of your older brothers decide to visit, they are most welcome to." Gilbert scoffed, "Fat chance!"

"Roderich and Mr. Vargas are free to visit and watch over you boys, but _not_ any of Vargas' grandsons."

Ludwig wasn't exactly sure why his grandfather implied that both Vargas brothers would visit, but nodded his head. Gilbert carefully crossed his arms, "Roderich? What the hell? Not like he wasn't at the fight too." "What was that?" He would've repeated himself, but he realized that if it was between the stuffy Roderich and the awkward Ludwig he'd take his chances with the snob, "Nothing…"

Opa gave a small smirk, "This should give me a chance to get away from some stress and you boys will learn some responsibility." Gilbert balled his fists at the word stress. _Stupid old man doesn't understand a goddamn thing!_ Gilbert got up and walked away.

"Gilbert!"

Gilbert turned back, "I'm done with my food and you're done telling us about your trip, so can't I leave now?" He gave a quick look over at Ludwig and was a little surprised at the look on his face. Ludwig gave him such a hurtful, hateful glare. Gilbert thought that he might feel a little better if he got his little brother in trouble, but that look was _not_ what he expected.

He ran to the bathroom and looked at his arm. He thought that maybe he was a little too pale for his own good since every mark was very noticeable. Gilbert rubbed his face in his hands several times while thinking about his brother. _Shit, West looked like he was gonna fucking cry!_ He knew it wasn't the first time he'd ever gotten his brother in trouble or to cry, but that was years ago. And this felt different.

He looked in the medicine cabinet and pulled out a hidden razor blade he'd forgotten about and almost dropped it. He caught it by his hip and remembered Katyusha showing Gilbert her hip. By no means did Gilbert like what he saw, but if he could still do it without it being noticeable…

"Shit, that still kinda hurts."

He looked at his now bleeding side and thought about the pain. _Maybe I need to feel this pain…_ He did it a few more times until it didn't hurt anymore, "Damn, I don't want to mess up my pants." A knock on the bathroom door made Gilbert drop the razor, "Occupied, damn it!" He sighed after whoever left. _It was probably Ludwig_ he sighed to himself.


	8. BadBye

The day after the fight at school was a noisy one. Many of the students were talking about the fight. Not many fights happen, but when they do they're big news. And because Gilbert wasn't there, everyone flocked around Ludwig, who was in absolutely no mood to talk about the fight or his brother.

The vice principal wasn't in any better shape, either. He got several calls from parents who found out about the fight and that it was his own grandson who was involved. Even some of the staff was talking behind his back about it.

Mr. Vargas lightly knocked on his door and let himself in, "Hey…how are you holding up?" Mr. Beilschmidt sighed and looked away, "I'm not some sick kid in the hospital, you know…" "Yeah, but you sure look like one right now." Vargas went up to his old friend, pulls him up from his chair and hugs him.

"Uhh, what are you doing?"

"Shhh, shh, shhhh. Don't talk. Just feel the hug and nothing else."

Beilschmidt was too exhausted to protest, so he decided to just pat him on his back. Vargas pulled away, but kept him close, "Listen, I know what some of the faculty are saying about this and I'm gonna have a staff meeting about it later. But, do _not_ let this get you down! We'll get through this trouble together!" Beilschmidt looked left and right, a little confused.

"I really hope that you're talking about the fight…"

The principal backed away a bit in confusion, "Huh? Of course I am! Is there some other rumor going around?" It didn't help that their faces were still pretty close. Beilschmidt cleared his throat with a slight tint of red to his cheeks, "Anyways, it's not really the staff that I'm stressing out about, if you know what I mean." Vargas thought about it a little bit, "The…boys?"

He stared at the other for a good while before talking again, "…Yes. All I can say for certain is that I definitely can't wait to leave on Sunday. I don't know how long I can take any of this! Hey, do you think you could watch over the boys for me while I'm gone?"

Mr. Vargas beamed up immediately, "Well, of course! I'll do anything for you. Anything!" "Say that louder to confirm the rumors…" Beilschmidt mumbled quietly. He then explained their punishments, "…And I also want you to let me know when you cannot watch them. I'll also be sending Roderich to watch them."

Vargas smiled as he left the office, "Don't worry I got this! Just redirect all your calls to me today! Just relax!" Mr. Beilschmidt sat back in his chair and looked out the window, "He has no idea what he's getting himself into."

On the other hand, Ludwig was still getting asked a bunch of questions about his brother that he had no way of answering, so he was glad that he was able to skip out on lunch by staying in the bathroom to avoid the obvious crowd.

"Ludwig?"

He quickly turned around and angrily yelled, "WHAT?" Feliciano whimpered and backed away. "Feliciano! No! I'm…I'm so sorry! It's just…" Feliciano hugged his friend's back, "Ve…I know, I know. Ludwig, are you okay? You've looked stressed all morning!"

Ludwig ran his hand through his hair several times, "Do I _look_ okay? Today has been nothing but 'Gilbert was so cool yesterday' or 'I can't believe your brother would fight that brute Ivan' and 'Tell your brother I think he's so hot!', Feliciano!" He banged his arm on the wall.

"Ludwig, stop it! You'll hurt yourself!"

"Blödes arschloch! This is all his fault!"

Feliciano really didn't know what to do. He had never seen his friend so angry before. As he tried to put his arms around him, Ludwig brushed him aside and left the bathroom, only to come face to face with Yekaterina. "I…uh…your Gilbert's…" Ludwig squeezed his eyes shut and spoke very quietly, "I…don't…want to hit a girl…" She gasped and Ludwig ran away from her.

 _Why did I say that to her? She must hate me now! No, this is her fault too. Why is that bitch even here today? I_ hate _her so much!_

Katyusha sighed and wiped a tear from her eye. She wasn't allowed to stay home with Ivan, so she had to settle with going to school and hearing people talking about her brother all day. They were much more verbal about it now because Ivan wasn't there to do anything about it. She tried talking to Francis and Antonio, but they would purposely avoid her. It wasn't as if the two didn't want some answers, but they were too upset to talk with her.

After school, Antonio was on his way to the student council room when Arthur stormed out of the room with an annoyed look on his face. Antonio shot him a look while Arthur snorted and looked away. The Spanish boy poked his head in the door, "Franny? Are you okay?"

Francis was sitting at a table rubbing his face in his hands, "Never better. And you?" Antonio crossed his arms, "You know what? I just passed by the Brit on my way over here. Say the word and I'll kick his ass!" Francis laughed, "Tu es très sympa. But, I will get another earful if you did something like that, just like Gilbert…" "That jerk yelled at you for that? Why?"

Francis laughed harder, "My precious Antonio! The only time I can ever hear you speak so ill of someone is when it's Arthur!" Antonio put on a goofy smile, "You're so silly, Francis! But, are you really in trouble?" He sighed, "Not really. It's just that fact that Gilbert is my friend and I knew about the fight, as did everybody in the school mind you, and being that I'm the vice president I should've done something to stop it."

Antonio sighed, "That Arthur, I swear…anyways, have you heard anything from Gilbert?" He shook his head, "I wish I had. And little Luddy seems to be ignoring us too! How rude!" "But...aren't we igno-" "Look, she was actually involved in this mess! The least Ludwig could do is tell us if Gil is okay."

At that same time, Ludwig was on his way to practice when Roderich met him halfway in the hall, "Ludwig." He tried to avoid Roderich, but he followed him anyway, "Ludwig, listen to me!" "Damn it, no! Not you! Of all people, Roderich, not you!" Roderich grabbed Ludwig's shirt and pulling him close, "I said listen!" Ludwig sighed and calmed down, "Okay, what do you want?"

Roderich also calmed down, "Thank you. I just needed to say two things. The first is a question. How is Gilbert doing?" "What do you think?" He gave a very heavy sigh, "I don't know, Ludwig. That's why I asked!" Ludwig knew that he was acting childish but he didn't care.

"H-he's…I don't know…"

"You don't know?"

"I-I don't care, alright! What else do you want from? Move, I'm going to be late!"

Roderich sighed once again, "Fine. I also wanted to say that…please don't let any of this foolishness get to you." "What do you mean? I'm fine!" Roderich tried not to sigh this time, but he did start groaning, "You're not fooling anybody with that attitude of yours, you know! You're getting stressed out about something that doesn't even involve you and everyone will probably forget about it over the weekend, so please don't worry about this too much, okay?"

Ludwig crossed his arms, "That's easy for you to say…" "Ludwig…" "I…understand what you mean, don't get the wrong idea, but you're not living with this _problem_." Ludwig walked away leaving Roderich confused, "Is he trying to say that Gilbert is his overarching problem?"

Gilbert's day was, to say the least, boring. He woke up in the afternoon and did nothing but watch television and play games in his messy room. Occasionally, he would leave his room to eat, but that was about it. His phone was taken away, so he couldn't talk with anybody except for his bird.

That night, he stayed in his room, pretending to be asleep, so that he wouldn't have to see anyone. Not that Ludwig cared.

…

The first week of Gilbert's suspension, also the same week Opa Beilschmidt was gone, was very dull for him. Mr. Vargas would visit them and tried to lift their spirits as much as he could, but with very little success. Gilbert thought that if he wasn't in school he'd have more fun, but completely forgot that his friends were still in school.

He was also starting to think that his friends had forgotten all about him since they hadn't attempted to visit him at all. He would usually want to cut himself when he had those thoughts, which were growing more and more everyday.

Luckily, that Thursday, Roderich was at the door. "Gilbert, it's good t-" Gilbert hugged him very tight, "I, uh,I miss you to." "Oh, sorry about that! I guess I haven't really seen anybody else, besides old man Vargas, in awhile!" Gilbert laughed it off and slapped Roderich's back, "So, what brings you over here? Miss me?"

Roderich composed himself, "Well, if you'd like to know, I brought these over for you." He handed Gilbert a stack of papers, "What the hell are these?" "Your homework." "My what?" Gilbert threw the papers on a near by table, "I'm fucking suspended from school, so why the hell do I still need to do homework?"

Roderich picked up the papers and held them out again, "So that you'll be caught up on your assignments when you get back." Gilbert still looked upset. "It was Grandfather's idea…" "Damn that old man!" Gilbert snatched the papers and walked toward the kitchen, "So, are you going to help me with these or not?" Roderich sighed and followed.

After a couple of hours, Gilbert finished all his homework and pouted, "….Yes, Gilbert?" "Are you gonna go now?" Roderich looked away. "Alright, that's it! We're gonna have a movie night tomorrow!" Roderich looked confused, "May I ask…what brought this up?"

"My ass has been cooped up in here like a prisoner for a whole week!"

"Well, that's kind of the point…"

"And I'm bored! We used to have movie nights every Friday anyway, but you fuckers have been too busy to give a damn anymore!"

Roderich groaned, "That's not our fault, Gilbert." "Shut your damn mouth, you know exactly what I mean! Now, are you going to come tomorrow or not?" Roderich stood up angrily, "Well, with _such_ a compelling argument, how could I say yes?" Gilbert quickly grabbed his arm, "Look…I'm sorry, alright? Just come tomorrow with Eliza and tell her to bring the movies, okay?"

This time Roderich glared at him, "What makes you think that I want to bring _her_ here?" Gilbert rose on eyebrow, "Huh?" Roderich corrected his tone, "What I meant was…you can't bring guests over, remember? Grandfather was very specific on that point." Gilbert felt he needed to ask about that outburst Roderich just had, but decided to drop it for now.

"So, what? You gonna tell him?"

"I…uh, well…"

Gilbert smirked, "You look like you could use some relaxation. Tomorrow night should be good for you, right? I don't know what's going on with you two, but still bring Eliza over and remember to tell her to bring the movies and I swear we'll all have a good time!" Roderich still looked away, "Would we…be able to get away with it?" Gilbert groaned louder and louder until he finally said, "F-fine! He…Westcouldcometoo…"

That surprised him, "What was that?" Gilbert sighed, "West could come too, okay?" "Are you sure about that? The two of you don't seem to be on the best of terms as of late." He smirked, "I-I don't know wh-what you're talking a-about!" "So I take it that you're going to ask Ludwig to come?" Roderich said as he readjusted his glasses.

"Ask Lud…hell no! I mean…"

Roderich sighed, "See? This is exac-" "Okay! It's…if I don't get a chance to tell him tonight then you do it tomorrow, alright?" Roderich picked up the papers and gave a smug smile, "Of course! But I really shouldn't have to ask, seeing as ho-" Gilbert got up and pushed Roderich toward the front door, "Okay, okay, I got it! Damn." He gave one last smile and left.

Ludwig walked by as he saw Gilbert closing the door, "I heard someone. Was Roderich just here? What did he want?" Gilbert walked to his room, "Nothing."

…

The next morning, Ludwig was walking with Feliciano to school. Even though Roderich had been right that almost everybody forgot about the fight or didn't care anymore during the week, there were those who still asked him questions.

Feliciano could still feel the immense anger and stress from his German friend, "Ludwig, I know th…big brother Francis!" Francis walked up to them, "Ah, ravi de te voir! Comment ça va, Feliciano? Ludwig?" Feliciano gave him a blank stare, so he gave a small laugh, "How are you doing this fine morning, you two?"

Feliciano smiled enough for the three of them, "We're just fine, Franny Fran!" "That's good because so am I!" Ludwig stayed silent as the other two laughed it up. That was until Francis gave him a very sly look, "Say, Feli, I need to speak with your dear little Ludwig for a moment. Do you mind?" He gave him a quick wink before he answered, "Of course, Franny! I'll see you later, Ludwig!"

Ludwig, needless to say, had no idea what just happened, "Feliciano, wait! How did…" He got a little angrier over the fact that Francis was still smiling, "Follow me, will you?" So they walked around the school for awhile, which was annoying Ludwig more and more, so he stopped walking, "Where are we going? We're going to be late for class at this rate."

Francis shook his head, "And you waited until _now_ to finally say something?" Ludwig turned back, "I'm tired of playing you and your group's games! I'm going back!" "Games? Wait! At least tell me how Gilbert is doing!" The younger of the two began to slowly breathe in and out, "You and your friend put him up to this and now you're asking how he is?"

"Up to what? I don't know where you're getting your information from, but Antonio and I most certainly did _not_ put him up to anything. In fact, we're the ones who tried to stop him!"

"Well, you should've tried harder!"

"Did _you_ try to stop him?"

Though that shut Ludwig up, Francis didn't end there, "I honestly don't know what's been up with Gilbert lately. He's letting every little thing get to him! I don't even know why he's still picking a fight with that Russian boy. He's angry at the wrong person!"

Ludwig perked up at that and grabbed Francis, "What? What do you know? Do you know why Bruder fought Ivan?" "Hey, calm down!" He pushed Ludwig's hand away, "Yes, he told us that his reason for hating Ivan is related to him quitting baseball." "But he never told _me_!" "I'm sorry, but that is something that Gilbert will have to tell you himself. He didn't really tell us until the day before the fight!"

He definitely didn't feel up to talking to his brother any time soon, so before he got the chance to get more out of Francis the morning bell rang. Francis left in a hurry, leaving Ludwig realizing that Gilbert really wasn't telling him anything anymore.

Later that day, Ludwig was walking the halls to his next class when he bumped into someone, "Ah, excuse me…" "Ludwig!" He was suddenly pulled into a bathroom, "Halt! What are you…?" "Good to see you too, Ludwig." Roderich smiled as he held onto Ludwig's arm, that he pulled back to his side, "What do you want?"

"Just wanted to make sure that you're still okay with tonight."

"Tonight? What about it? Are you visiting again?"

Roderich put his hand on his face, "Of course you wouldn't tell him, Gilbert…" "What are yo-" "Gilbert and I are going to watch movies at your house tonight…with Elizabeta." Ludwig crossed his arms, "What-the-hell? He never tells me anything! Roderich, you know very well that we can't have any guests over!"

Roderich copied Ludwig's expression, "Are you going to tell Grandfather, Ludwig?" He was completely shocked, "What are you saying?" Roderich knew it was wrong, but said it anyways, "Are you really going to tell on us, Ludwig? We're not little kids anymore. Unless you're so paranoid that Grandfather will find some way of finding this out. Just don't say anything!"

Ludwig was now more shocked and said, in a whisper, "Y…did Bruder put you up to this?" Roderich put his hands in the air and sigh, "Seriously, Ludwig? Seriously? You seriously think that every little…look, Gilbert invited you too, okay. I just wanted to make sure that you'll be there."

Ludwig's expression softened, "He…he did? I mean, he probably did it so that I wouldn't say anything to Grandfather…" Roderich rose an eyebrow, "Uh, no. I'm sure that he really does want you there as a…a means to patch things up, you know. And the only reason, the _only_ reason Elizabeta's coming is because she's bringing the movie."

"Do you really want her to come?"

"Of course I do! Does it sound like I don't?"

Ludwig mumbled to himself that it was another problem to deal with some other day and just nodded, "Okay…I'll tell Bruder it's fine. Um, exactly why did you pull me into the bathroom?" Roderich crossed his arms and pouted, "Because I knew that you would make a big fuss about this. And I was right because we almost missed class!"

They walked out of the bathroom and the bell rang ending that class period and Roderich held is head down, "Hurensohn, I think I had a test in that class today…"

…

Ludwig immediately rushed home after school so he can finally talk to his brother. As soon as he got inside the house it was freezing, "Wh-what the h-hell? Bruder!" Gilbert walked out wearing a black long sleeved shirt, "Oh, it's you…" Ludwig quickly grabbed his shoulder, "Wait! Why is it so cold in here? It feels cool outside!"

Gilbert pouted, "Oh great, West! Tell me _more_ about the outside world, would you? How the hell am I supposed to know how it _feels_ outside?" "Maybe if you opened a window…no, this is not what I wanted to talk about." Gilbert sneered, "Talk about?"

"About tonight…"

Gilbert sat down, "Yeah? What about it?" Ludwig cleared his throat, "Well, a-are you sure you should, I mean…we're not re-" Gilbert loudly yawned, "Uh huh, anyways I think you should probably get cleaned up before the guests arrive. Unless you're planning to tell the old man about this."

"Why does everybody think that I'm going to tell on them?"

"You really wouldn't, West? Really?"

He growled, "N-no, no I won't, alright? Just turn the air off. It's freezing in here." "NO! Uhh…I've been feeling very hot in here…to go along with my smoking hot good looks!" Ludwig walked away, "Never mind that I asked." Gilbert let out a huge sigh after he left. He didn't expect to talk with his brother for so long. He was afraid that his brother might catch on that he was freezing the house so that he could wear his shirt without question.

Two hours later, Roderich came over with a frown on his face, "Roderich! Good to see you again!" He walked past Gilbert, "Yes, good to see…" Gilbert was now definitely confused, "What the hell's wrong with you? And where's Eliza?"

She came up behind Gilbert and hugged him, "Hey, sexy! Long time no see!" "Eliza! As hot as ever!" He turned around and properly hugged her, "So, what's up with Roddy?" Her expression changed, "He just has a stick up his ass is all." Gilbert had a concerned look as he closed the door. _Fuck, I hope they aren't having some stupid fight and ruin everything!_

Elizabeta dropped three DVDs on the coffee table. "So, what'd you bring?" She picked up the movies, "Well, I had some trouble picking these, but the first one we're gonna watch is one of your favorite action movies." "Awesome! What's that one?"

She made a quick glance at Roderich before looking away, "That's the next one we'll see. It's actually a pretty popular indie movie that came out this year. It's about young painter who struggles in life to get himself and his works noticed. It's based on one of the director's friends." "Boring! What's the last one?"

Eliza sighed, "It's an action indie movie. I knew that you're interests will go down as the night went on, so I thought 'action, true-story, action'." Gilbert nodded, "I see. Well, let's get started!" He forced her to sit between him and Roderich, "There! Isn't this great, you guys? It sure has been a while." Roderich folded his arms, "I guess…"

Gilbert definitely felt the heavy tension in the air, "Uh…um…Ludwig! Hey, come in here! We're about to start!" Roderich looked at the TV, "You don't have to yell. He's been standing in the hall ever since we came in." Ludwig flinched and walked out, "Hey…" Eliza got up and hugged Ludwig, "Luddy! So good to see you! Come, sit with me."

She put Ludwig between herself and Roderich. She wrapped one arm around Ludwig's and had her other arm around Gilbert. Roderich whispered, "Schlampe." She smirked, "Picsa." "You li-" Gilbert shot up and put in the first DVD, "Okay! Let's start the night!"

After the first action packed movie finished, the tension went considerably down. While the credits played, Eliza went into the kitchen to get a drink and then Gilbert followed and cornered her, "Okay, what the hell is going on?" She put on an annoyed look, "What? We don't see each other all week and you ask me about some crap?" "I'm serious, Eliza!"

She blew the hair from her eyes, "If you must know…it started from your fight." "Wh-what?" "It was stupid. I believed that you did the right thing by fighting that jerk, but Roderich thinks that fighting never solves anything and all that crap. I mentioned that he used to get beaten up all the time, he called me a bully and then I mentioned about how Vash would bail him out all the time and that how things got this bad."

Gilbert backed away and leaned on the counter, "I-I see. Okay…that's all I wanted to know." "Are you okay?" Gilbert nodded and Eliza left. Gilbert now felt immense guilt for causing his friends to fight as bad as they are, especially when he wasn't there.

He grabbed his arm tightly and looked at a small knife. He promised himself that he wouldn't cause any unnecessary suspicion, so he didn't cut himself that day. Actually, he hadn't cut himself in three days. He still couldn't shake that feeling of guilt away, so he put the knife in his pocket and sat down in a position so as not to stab himself. _I'm so fucking sad…_

As they watched the second film, Gilbert actually felt like he really understood the painter. Ludwig scoffed at the guy, "Are they serious with this? How can someone act this way?" Gilbert looked over to him, "What do you mean?"

Ludwig pointed at the TV, "Well, look at him taking drugs! He's obviously not someone who thinks clearly. He blames all his troubles on himself and he pushes away those who try to help him and takes drugs in order to cope with his problems. He's a coward."

Gilbert now pointed at the screen, "What are you talking about? His friends are dicks who only care about themselves! Of course he can't turn to those pricks! And when he tries to the help _them_ , he fucks it up. No wonder he's an addict!"

"Are you saying that it's okay to take drugs to solve your problems?"

"No, but I don't think you should hate the guy for life taking a huge dump on him."

Ludwig was getting annoyed, "I'm not saying I hate the guy, it's ju-" Roderich shushed them and they stayed quiet for the rest of the movie. In the end, it turned out that the artist died of an overdose and the friend who found his body sold the last painting he made before he started taking drugs and used that money to fund his funeral.

Eliza stretched, "Well, that surely was an interesting movie! Ready for the last one?" Roderich gave her a short glance, "Sure." Ludwig gave a nod while Gilbert was lost in thought. "Gil, are you ready to watch the next one?" He snapped out of his thoughts, "Oh, yeah! Right…"

While they watched the third movie, Gilbert couldn't help but identify with the painter in the last movie. It was making him feel more and more depressed about his life and started thinking about a lot of depressing things. Eliza noticed how unsettled he was getting and was hoping it wasn't because of the movie they were watching. Gilbert suddenly remembered about the knife in his pocket.

"Gotta go to the bathroom, sorry."

"Wanna pause the movie?"

"…No. That's fine."

After twenty minutes, Eliza began to worry. She knew she heard the bathroom door close about five minutes ago, "I'll be right back." She went into the hall and to Gilbert's room. She opened the door slightly and saw Gilbert pacing around his bed with something in his hand and his sleeves up.

Gilbert was still thinking whether or not he really should do it. He really wanted that bad feeling to go away, but had no good way of completely covering up the blood. Though, that's way he decided to wear a black shirt. That's when he made up his mind and held out his left arm, which Eliza had a better view of and saw the scars.

"Gilbert?"

He almost dropped the knife and hid it behind his back, "E-Eliza! What are…what are you doing in here?" "Gilbert, what's wrong with your arm?" He cursed under his breath, "It's…it's nothing. Just be quiet, okay? I'll be back in a-"

"What are you hiding, Gilbert? Oh my g…does this have to do with your arm?"

Gilbert gripped on the knife and talked quieter, "Shut up! I said it's fine, so go back an-" "Then tell me what you're doing in here!" He was completely scared. He really did want to tell her, but was completely frozen in place.

When Eliza stepped into the room, Gilbert stepped back, "Gilbert, you're scaring me. Please, just tell me…" "What's taking so long?" Roderich yelled out, having paused the movie for awhile now. "Eliza, I don't…" Gilbert shut his eyes thinking of what he should do. He knew he should have been more careful, but he couldn't help it.

"Is…is that a real knife?"

Eliza backed into the wall after inching around to see what Gilbert was hiding. Hearing something hit the wall, Roderich and Ludwig immediately went to his room. Roderich looked at Eliza, "What's wrong? Did he do something to you?" She shook her head, "I th-think he has a knife!"

Ludwig became shocked, "What? Bruder, what are you doing? Were you attacking her?" Gilbert spat out, "What? Hell no! I would never!" "Then why do you have a knife in your hands, in your room?" Gilbert tried to think of many logical reasons for having a knife in his room, but his mind was absolutely blank.

Gilbert gave a small shiver and accidently dropped the knife. Everyone was silent for awhile, until Eliza spoke up, "Did you use that on your arm?" Before anyone said anything, Ludwig rushed to his brother and grabbed one of his bare arms and held it up. He immediately covered his mouth and cringed, as did the other two.

His pale arm was filled with many red marks. Some of them with scars and some were swollen. "Bloody hell…Bruder, what is this?" Ludwig said with a disgusted look. Gilbert started freaking out, "Get the hell away from me!" He pulled his arm back and hid it from view.

"Bruder, why?"

Gilbert couldn't believe this was happening. He was having an even harder time thinking, "D-don't tell Gramps, please!" "Damn it, Gilbert, forget about that and just tell me what the hell this is!" Roderich stayed quiet for the most part, but could tell this was wrong, "Ludwig, please calm down!"

Ludwig yelled back, "I am calm!" He grabbed Gilbert's other arm and quickly let go as soon as he saw it, "I think I'm going to be sick…Bruder, this is sick!" "Ludwig, I said stop!" Roderich went up to him, but was pushed back with force.

While they were distracted, Gilbert picked up the knife and held it out at them. Ludwig was now furious, "How DARE you! What the hell is going through your head? Put that knife down, NOW!" Gilbert's hand shook and he moved the knife to his right arm, over his wrist.

"Please, just forget about this! Please leave me alone!"

Ludwig shook his head, "Gilbert, what are you playing at now? You're so sad! Why do you think any of this is a good idea? Why couldn't you just tell me anything? Why do you always have to fucking hide everything from me?" He slammed his fist into the wall, making everyone in the room flinch. Gilbert's bird finally flew out of its cage and landed on his bed post. Gilbert noticed this and closed his eyes.

"Do you really hate me that much, West?"

"Ludwig, don-"

"If you're going to keep this up, of course I'll hate you!"

With that, Gilbert's will and heart broke. He looked down at his right arm and the knife. Eliza was stunned, "Lud…Ludwig, you can't! H-how…" Suddenly, Gilbert let out a horrific scream. They looked back at him and he was on the floor, holding his now bleeding arm. Eliza now freaked out, "What did you do?"

"B-Bruder…he just…"

Eliza ran straight out the room and to the nearest phone to call an ambulance. Roderich grabbed a towel and started pressing hard on Gilbert's quickly bleeding arm, whose head was pressed against Roderich's chest as he groaned in pain. Ludwig stood completely shaken by all that happened.

Roderich gestured for him to help, so Ludwig kneeled next to them, hands shaking. "Get me another towel, Ludwig!" He grabbed a nearby shirt and tried to squeeze as hard as he could, making Gilbert cry out more. He then moved his head to this brother's chest and looked up at him before losing consciousness.

"I guess…you really do…hate me now, ja?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Written in 2010) That movie plot in there was totally made up. If it's the plot of something real, then it was completely unintentional. Though, the title was intentional! It's from a Vocaloid song. Look up the title on YouTube and you'll know what I mean.


	9. Unfortunate Reality

The only thing that Ludwig knew for sure was that everything was happening so fast. In one moment he was about to tell Gilbert that he hated him and in the next moment he was lying down motionless, possibly dead, in his arms. It all happened so fast that Ludwig couldn't catch up to anything.

He couldn't hear the helpless shouts from Roderich for Gilbert to wake up or when the paramedics came to take his brother away. Roderich had to practically push him into the ambulance while he told him that he'll contact their grandfather, but nothing got through to Ludwig and he got pushed around everywhere.

Once they got to the hospital, a nurse tried talking with Ludwig but he hardly responded. Judging by his name, the nurse got a German speaking doctor to talk with him. Ludwig was too shaken to let them know that he could understand her. Even so, he responded to the doctor as little as possible, but enough to get the information they needed from him.

Unfortunately, it took almost two hours for Ludwig's grandfather to make it there with Roderich and Elizabeta. As soon as he found out where Gilbert was, he went immediately to Ludwig. It was already past midnight when he got there, but he made sure had enough energy to reach over to his grandson and hug him.

"Ludwig, Ludwig! Are you okay?"

Ludwig couldn't look his grandfather in the eye, so he just nodded and his grandfather hugged him tighter, "I'm so glad. Your older brothers should be arriving shortly." Ludwig immediately looked up with a confused expression.

Opa Beilschmidt crossed his arms, "I know, Ludwig. I called and they told me that they were planning a surprise visit and were on their way over now. Great timing on their part, right?" Ludwig looked away and Opa sighed. He was definitely not the comforting type.

He was thrown out of his thoughts when Ludwig sat down. Roderich and Elizabeta sat across from him so Opa Beilschmidt quickly sat down next to Ludwig. He sighed and made subtle glances at him trying to think of anything to say.

He noticed how tired and distressed Ludwig looked, so he leaned on him, "I'm sure that Gilbert will be fine. He's a very stubborn boy. I should know because it runs in the family." Ludwig gave a short nod and his grandfather couldn't help but smile a little at the reaction.

It was at that time that he knew what he had to do, "I'll be right back, kids. I'm going to make a short phone call." He stood up and tried to walk away, but he felt a small tug on his shirt. Ludwig looked away as he held on to the end on his grandfather's shirt.

He smiled and put his hand on his grandson's, "Ludwig, I'll be fine. It's just a phone call. I'll be back." He moved the hand and left. Eliza smiled from across, "Don't feel bad, Luddy. You make it seem as if…as if Gilbert…won't…" Her voice started to crack and Roderich held her tight.

…

Feliciano and his grandfather got to the hospital in twenty minutes and ran inside as fast as they could. Mr. Vargas immediately went to the front desk, "Excuse me, but could you tell…Feliciano, get back here!" Feliciano was too worried about his friends and started running around to try to find them himself.

His grandfather's patience was wearing thin, "Damn it, Feliciano! Now is not the time to…uh, sorry about that. Do you know where…Feliciano, where are you?" "Right here, Nonno!" "Can you please tell me where Gilbert Beilschmidt is being held?" The receptionist gave him a crazed looked before looking on the computer to find out.

"He's currently on the second flo-"

"Okay!"

Feliciano ran into an elevator before he heard anything else, "Feliciano! Merda…ah, sorry about that again! My grandson's just a little worried about his friend, you see. Now, can you please tell me exactly where his again, please?"

As soon as the elevator doors opened on the second floor, Feliciano immediately ran, until someone made him stop, all over the huge floor calling for Ludwig. Once he found him, he started running again, but then instantly hid behind a wall.

The reason he hid as quickly as he did was because he saw something he didn't expect to see. He saw Ludwig's older brothers standing around. He had not seen any of them for years, so seeing them caught him off guard. That, and the fact that they all looked the same, except for the one with dark hair, which was probably dyed. Feliciano could've sworn that three of them were triplets.

Of course, his nervousness went away as soon as he saw Ludwig. The look on his face alone made Feliciano run past the brothers and straight to his friend. It took Ludwig a minute to register what just happened, "F-Felici…ano?"

"Ludwig! Ludwig, Ludwig, Ludwig!"

Feliciano hugged him tighter and started snuggling him. "I see that your grandson found his way here," Opa Beilschmidt said as soon as Mr. Vargas walked behind him. Needless to say, he was furious, "Damn that grandson of mine! Running around the hospital like a damn child! I know he's worried, but he could've been seriously lost!"

The elder Beilschmidt was surprised to say the least, "I don't think I'd ever seen you so angry at Feliciano before." "I never said the boy was perfect…I just can't stay mad at him for too long. Like now, see?" Feliciano had tears in his eyes as he was sitting next to Ludwig with their faces cheek to cheek as the brothers watched amused.

Beilschmidt crossed his arms, "So, where's your other grandson? Was it too late in the night for him?" "Oh, uh…you see…um…"

…

Once his grandfather told him Gilbert was in the hospital, Feliciano was already in the car. Lovino stayed in his bed, "Lovino, don't you wanna go to the hospital to see your friends?" He threw a pillow at his grandfather, "Seriously? They're not my friends, damn it! I _never_ said I liked those potato eating bastards! Stop confusing me with Feliciano!"

Nonno Vargas put on a sad expression, "But, my little Lovi…at least come for support! I know your brother would appreciate it." Lovino sat up, "I don't give a shit!" "Lovino! Watch your language!" "It's one in the morning! It's way too late to go see someone I don't give two shits about in the first place."

His grandfather walked up to him, "What did I say about your language!" Lovino froze for a minute and then pouted and sunk deeper in his bed, "I…I don't wanna go…" "Are you sure?" He gave him back the pillow, "I said they're not my friends, alright? It'll…it'll be awkward…"

He put his hand on Lovino's head, "Okay, I can't force you to go. Will you be alright on your own?" Lovino tried to turn his head away, "What? Do I look fu…do I look five? I'm just going to go to sleep!" His grandfather laughed, "So you are. Want me to call when I find out anything?"

Lovino growled, "What did I just say? I'm going to sleep!" "So…?" "S-so…I…just tell me in the morning, okay? Not that I _care_!" He kissed Lovino's forehead, "Of course not." "Just leave already, old man! Feli's gonna get all impatient!"

….

Elder Vargas let out a heavy sigh, "Uh…something like that…I'll tell him everything in the morning…" "Ah, I see." He didn't really understand, but he nodded anyway. Suddenly, a doctor approached the two older men, "Are you Gilbert Beilschmidt's guardian?" There was an immediate silence from the small group, "Yes, I am. Will my grandson be alright?"

The doctor nodded, "Yes, for the most part, Gilbert will be fine. His arm should be healed within a couple of weeks." Everybody felt relived, especially Ludwig, who had a tight grip on Feliciano's hand. As much as he hated to, Opa Beilschmidt had to ask, "What do you mean 'for the most part'?"

The doctor looked around at everyone and gave a small sigh, "Well, the knife that Gilbert used was not that large, but unfortunately the cut was still pretty deep. Not enough to cause major blood loss, but he did cut his tendons pretty badly." "What does that means?" "It means that…Gilbert may have lost most of the major functions of his wrist and hand."

That caused a huge commotion among everyone, but the elder Beilschmidt stopped them, "Is there anything else you could do? Anything we could do?" The doctor looked at his charts, "It was a very good thing we were able to operate on Gilbert as soon as we did." Roderich gripped on Eliza's hand and smiled at her.

"Once Gilbert wakes up, we'll have to start him on some rehabilitation for his wrist. The sooner we do this the faster his healing can begin. After that, I'd like to talk about setting him up with a hand therapist. As well as a psychologist, from what it seems."

"No! Not Gilbert!"

All of them turned to Ludwig, who said his first words since coming there. His grandfather would've interfered, but he was too shocked by the strange outburst. The doctor gave him a concerned look, "You're his younger brother that came in with him in from the ambulance, am I right? I know all of this must be a major shock to you, but even _you_ must know that your brother will need some help. Please und-"

Ludwig stood up, "No, _you_ don't understand! Gilbert doesn't need any help!" Feliciano grabbed his hand and tried to pull him back down to his seat, but he ignored him, "Nothing is wrong with him! It was…it was all…it was my…" Ludwig's older brothers stopped him and he sat back down with his head hanging low.

Mr. Vargas stepped up, "Ah, it's getting really late. I know everybody must surely be tried." He looked over to Ludwig, "Why don't we finish this discussion in the morning, okay? We know that Gilbert is fine, so that should be enough."

Ludwig immediately shook his head, causing some of his brothers to laugh and joke at how childishly cute he was acting. Mr. Vargas sighed and Ludwig's grandfather pinched the bridge of his nose, "Ludwig, we can't stay here, not tonight. We have to go. Gilbert will still be here in the morning." He looked at the doctor to confirm that it was okay and the doctor walked up to him and nodded.

"We'll discuss the rest of this tomorrow, privately."

Feliciano clung onto Ludwig and stared at his grandfather, but he shook his head, "I'm sorry, Feli, but you can't stay with him tonight. He's already going to have a full house and you don't want to inconvenience them, do you?" Feliciano sadly nodded.

The truth was that the elder Beilschmidt wouldn't have minded Feliciano staying with them at all, but his old friend had a good point, "We'll come pick you up in the morning, alright?" Feliciano smiled before hugging Ludwig goodbye and leaving.

With Feliciano gone, Ludwig seemed to slowly gravitate toward Roderich. He almost choked as he yawned when Ludwig hid behind him. Elizabeta found it cute, "I'm all wiped out too. I think I need to get home now."

Roderich nodded and looked at his younger cousin, "Yes, I believe we really should be going. I think he's more exhausted than all of us." Ludwig quickly shook his head again, but his older brothers immediately grabbed him and pulled him toward the elevator as they were already very tired for having traveled all day.

After dropping off Roderich and Elizabeta at their homes, the Beilschmidt family made their way home. Once there, all of them unconsciously made their way to Gilbert's room. The room was still messy, though it was made worse with the very noticeable blood stain on the carpet. Next to it was the also stained towel and shirt and the bloody knife.

Opa Beilschmidt felt dizzy, "I'll…we'll clean it up in the morning…" Just as he was closing the door, tiny chirps were heard, "Hey, it's the 'Gilbird'!" one of the brothers shouted and walked over to said bird and put it back in its cage and then putting out more food. Ludwig continued to stare at the same spot that he held Gilbert.

"Uh, hey…mind if I sleep in your room tonight, Luddy?"

Ludwig wasn't sure how to respond. Usually when his older brothers visited some of them would sleep in the guest room, former bedroom, the others would sleep in Gilbert's room, and Gilbert would sleep in Ludwig's room. The circumstances as they were, Ludwig complied.

His brother gave a smile that reminded him of Gilbert. It also helped that his brother also had short spiky hair. He looked around the room and was about to ask where he would sleep, but Ludwig quickly jumped in his bed and motioned his brother to get in the bed. "You want me to get in with you? Aren't we too bi…oh. Damn, Gil babies you too much…" he said under his breath.

Later that morning, Ludwig's brother woke up to his younger brother hugging his arm very tightly, "Luddy, Luddy, wake up! You're hurting my arm!" "I _am_ awake." The both of them looked at each other for a good ten minutes until the older of the two jumped out of the bed and ran out the room. _I am never sleeping in the same bed as Ludwig again!_


	10. The Inevitable

At the hospital, the Beilschmidt family plus Feliciano made their way to the front desk. They asked for Gilbert's doctor, who happened to walk by them, "Doctor! There you are…can we go to see my grandson now? Did he ever awake?"

The doctor thought about it a little, "Well, he has yet to wake up. But, I don't see any problem with his family seeing him. I only ask that you let me know when he wakes up so that we can start his rehab right away." The doctor opened the door and they started going in until Ludwig hesitated.

"Ve~? Ludwig, don't you wanna see big brother Gil?"

"…"

His grandfather rubbed his back, "Don't worry. You can go see him when you're ready." Feliciano stayed behind with Ludwig as the others went in the room. Right away, they were glad that Gilbert was able to get into a private room because they wouldn't have wanted anyone to see how shocked they were at seeing him.

Gilbert was lying peacefully on the bed although he appeared paler than he usually was. He had a temporary cast on his right arm and an IV hooked up in his left arm. Unfortunately, Gilbert's arms were completely exposed and his numerous scars were shown to all in the room. Some of his cuts were dressed as they were either reopened or infected.

The elder Beilschmidt rubbed his fingers along his grandson's arm and trembled. One of his grandsons went up and held Gilbert's free hand. When he squeezed the hand, Gilbert started groaning, "G-Gilbert? Are…are you awake?" His arms felt too heavy to stretch, so he twisted his head around and gave out a huge yawn before slowly opening his eyes to a large figure with long hair looming over him.

"West? I-is that…you? Oh West, you look so much…older! I c-can't tell if it's you or a younger gramps. I can't believe you grew up…into s-such a beautiful…hot young woman."

Almost immediately Gilbert's older brothers laughed as the 'young woman' pinched his younger brother's nose shut, "Gahhh! I'm up! I'm up!" Even his grandfather started to laugh, "Gilbert, how are you feeling?" "Feel…where the hell am I? This isn't my room!" Gilbert frantically looked around the room.

"Gilbert, do you remember anything from last night?"

Gilbert stopped and slowly opened his mouth, "W-well…I, uh, I was with Roderich and…" He didn't want to say that Eliza was there too, but his grandfather sighed, "Both Roderich _and_ Elizabeta were with us last night." Gilbert frowned, "I-I see…anyways, I remember watching some movies and, oh right! West was there too! Say, where is little West anyways?"

"He's…Luddy outside at the moment…"

"Oh…guess he's still mad at me then."

"What happened with you and Ludwig last night? He won't say anything."

Gilbert opened and then closed his mouth and touched his cast with his hand, which his grandfather promptly removed, "I'm getting the doctor. We were told to get them when you awoke." He walked out and called out for the doctor.

Once the doctor went in the room, everyone else got out. Feliciano noticed that they all seemed to be in high spirits, "Did…did Gilbert wake up, sir?" Opa Beilschmidt smiled, "Yes, he is fine. And back to his mischievous self. The doctor said that we could see him again once they're finished."

Feliciano was ecstatic, "Che meraviglia! Ludwig, Ludwig! Did you hear that? Gil Gil is okay! Isn't that great?" Ludwig gave him a weak nod, worrying him. He could already tell that Ludwig did not get enough sleep. He really wished he knew what happened that night so that he could help, "Roderich!" Ludwig jumped, "W-what?"

Feliciano grabbed his phone, "We forgot all about Roderich!" Roderich was still asleep in his room with his punched out alarm clock on the floor. When his phone rang at its loudest volume, he rolled around in his bed trying to find the noise and destroy it.

Fortunately for him, it took awhile to find the phone so he was more awake once he found it, "Verdammt!" He jumped off his bed and rolled on the ground, "Feliciano! What the hell?" "Ve! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to forget about you! I-I thought Ludwig or…or one of his brothers…"

Immediately, a lot of fumbling and loud sounds were heard from the Austrian's side, "I'm going to leave right now!" Feliciano suddenly felt cold, "No, don't! You can't drive here!" "Feliciano, I know how to drive…"

"But you'll get loooooost!"

"Why does everybody say that?"

The phone made a loud click and he hung up, "Ve…Roderich's on his way over here now…" Ludwig sighed and looked at the room door. He was so tired, but every time he closed his eyes he remembered the look on Gilbert's face when he told him that he'd hate him. He didn't even know why he said it. He most definitely didn't mean it.

The doctor came out of the room and smiled, "Don't worry, I told Gilbert that he needs to keep up with his exercises, but…Mr. Beilschmidt, may I speak with you?" "Oh, yes…of course. You kids go on ahead and see Gilbert." They started to walk away, but the doctor stopped.

"Um, please don't give him or leave anything too sharp, alright? Just as a safety precaution, of course."

Ludwig gave the doctor a hard glare causing the doctor to back up and quickly walk away. "I guess we'll go in first," Ludwig's older brothers said as they went in the room and Ludwig couldn't help but feel helpless. Feliciano put his arm around Ludwig's shoulders, "You're gonna have to see him eventually…" Ludwig sighed, _Believe me, Feliciano, I know._

Almost thirty minutes later, Roderich arrived with Elizabeta, "Eliza! Ve…what are you doing here?" She giggled and punched Roderich's arm, "First things first. Roddy has something to say to you, do you?" Roderich sulked and rubbed his arm, "S-sorry, Feliciano…" "Ve? Sorry for what?"

Roderich looked away, but Elizabeta put up her fist, "Aah, sorry for yelling at you on the phone! I broke my alarm clock and woke up late on my own! You had nothing to do with my tardiness! Es tut mir sehr leid! Please don't hit me again!" Feliciano hugged him, "I don't know about that last part, but I forgive you!"

Roderich sighed in relief, but Elizabeta still hit him, "He spent about twenty minutes driving around with his head up his ass trying to find this fucking place until he _somehow_ made it to my house and I had to drive the both of us here even though I only have a damn learner's permit and we got here almost instantly!" Ludwig was taken aback by her rough manner of speaking. Usually, when directed at him, she spoke more politely.

Ludwig's brothers filed out of the room laughing and in a good mood, "Hey, Luddy, Gil's kinda worried about you. Gonna go in now?" "Well…I…" Roderich stepped up, "I-I'll go in now, if you don't mind!" His older cousins started mischievously crowding around him, but he slipped past them and made it in the room with Elizabeta. "Aww, we just wanted to play with Roddy for a bit first!"

Gilbert was absolutely not expecting to see those two, so he was reasonably shocked. "Gilbert!" Elizabeta ran and hugged him as tight as she could, "G-good to see you too." She was almost in tears, "Don't you ever, EVER do that again!" She gives him a long kiss on the lips and he smiles, "Kesesese, with a kiss like that how could I even try?"

Roderich was still moping by the door. "You know, Roddy, I think two kisses would really seal the deal, if you know what I mean~!" Roderich crossed his arms, "No! I'm…I'm very upset with you!" Gilbert looked at Eliza and she gave a sad smile, "He's so cute when he worries about others!"

"I am not worried, I'm pissed!"

Gilbert stretched out his arms the best he could, "Stop pouting and give my awesomeness a hug! Don't hesitate on that kiss either!" He turned away from Gilbert, quickly wiped away a tear from his eye, and walked over and hugged him. "There! Are you happy now?"

He thought about and looked over to Eliza again, "I don't know…maybe?" Gilbert tapped his lips, but Roderich kissed his forehead, "I really am glad that you are okay, Gilbert." Gilbert felt a little embarrassed, "Damn, Roddy, gotta make me blush like this! I'm…I'm really sorry."

Roderich's face got red and he was about to speak, but his voice cracked and he promptly stopped it. Elizabeta went over to him and held his shoulders, "I hate to sound all sappy, but you do know that we really do love you and that you can talk to us whenever you feel like doing…this again, okay?" She walks over and slides her hand across Gilbert's arm, "Yeah, I know."

Roderich takes off his glasses and walks to another corner in the room, "Damn it, you prissy crybaby! You better come over here and cry in my fucking manly arms!" Elizabeta had to admit that line was a little funny so she pulled then pushed Roderich onto Gilbert. He breathed in and out until he knew he could talk properly even though he was now in tears.

"You unrefined idiot! H-how dare you scare us like that? I tried calling out to you, but you wouldn't answer me. You're such a cruel bastard…we love you too much for this…"

Well, Gilbert didn't expect _that_ kind of reaction. And when he looked over to Elizabeta, she gave him thumbs up with tears rolling down her face, "My friends are weird."

…

While Roderich and Elizabeta were in the room, Ludwig's brothers went to get some food and left Ludwig and Feliciano alone, "Ludwig, looks like we're finally alone." He looked away and Feliciano gave out a rare groan, "Ludwig, we're finally alone~!" "And?"

Feliciano stood up, "And it's time for you to tell me why you won't say anything. Why you won't you say more than two words? Tell me, please!" Ludwig tried looking everywhere but at Feliciano, "I…I…I can't! I-if I say anything…what I said, I could…I told Gilbert I hated him!" Feliciano backed away slightly, "Wh-what?"

Ludwig smoothed out his hair, "I didn't exactly say it, but I practically told him that I hated him and that's why he…if I say anything, I'll probably hurt someone again!" Feliciano put his hands on Ludwig's face and forced him to look up, "No, Ludwig, no! You did _not_ put that knife his hand or tell him to cut himself!" "But I-"

Feliciano hugged his head, "You just weren't thinking at the time, that's all. Ludwig is always good at thinking before he speaks, so when he doesn't I guess terrible things happen, right?" Ludwig didn't know what to say, so Feliciano pulled away his hands and got close up to his face, "You know, I wa-"

He heard someone whistling and noticed that the brothers came back, so Feliciano sat back down again and silently pouted to himself. Sadly, Ludwig didn't feel any better. _I know that Feliciano means well, but he wasn't there! It didn't matter that I wasn't thinking, the point is that I said it!_

Roderich and Eliza left the room, "Sorry, but we're going to leave now. Send Grandfather my regards." Once they left, the Italian boy pulled on his friend's arm, "Come on, Gil is waiting for us!" Ludwig started to panic and Feliciano stopped, "It's fine…I'll go first."

Ludwig started panicking again, "Y-you're not…mad at me, are you? I know that I've been acting childish, but…" Feliciano smiled, "Of course I'm not mad, silly! Just promise me that you will definitely see him after me!" Ludwig nodded and Feliciano left. As soon as he did, the older brothers quietly surrounded Ludwig.

Feliciano slowly walked in, "G-Gilbert?" Gilbert was shocked again, "Oh, you have got to be shitting me. Feli, you came too? That is _so_ fucking awesome! You better give me a hug!" Feliciano practically ran into his arms and cried.

"Gilbert, Gilbert! I'm so glad you're alright! I don't want big brother Gilbert to die! I love Gilbert!"

He laughed and patted his head, "Hey now, leave all that love for West, ja?" Feliciano laughed, "I have plenty of love for everyone, Gil Gil!" When he caught sight of his arm, Feliciano couldn't help but flinch and Gilbert knew why.

"Ah, so you finally saw my arm…p-pretty gross, right?"

"Can I…can I touch it?"

"Uh…yeah, why not? Who'd ever resist a touch from someone as cute as you?"

Feliciano rubbed his hands on the arms and was careful not to be rough, "These must have hurt big brother…" Gilbert shyly looked away, "Uh, no…not really." Feliciano hugged him again and Gilbert sighed, "So, is West really out there?" Feliciano nodded and hugged tighter, "He's just a little nervous, but he really wants to see you!" "I see…"

After a few more minutes, Feliciano walked out and saw Ludwig surrounded by his older brothers. Some were heckling him for making Feliciano upset, while some of the others were pulling him around. One brother was constantly poking his cheek. When Ludwig saw that his friend was back, he immediately broke free of his brothers and 'hid' behind Feliciano.

"I'm so happy that you wanna see Gil so much!"

He almost forgot that he was stalling himself, "Oh, that's right…" Feliciano rose up his arms to grab him, but then placed them back down, "I'm not gonna force you or push you into his room. I want Ludwig to go see Gil on his own!" Not what Ludwig was expecting, but he was right. It would be better if he went in on his own, "Thank you, I'll g-go in now."

Ludwig slowly went in, first popping his head in the room to see where his brother might be. When Gilbert saw him, he almost yelled out but stopped himself. They couldn't look each other in the eye, so Ludwig slowly made his way to the left side of his brother and sat down in a chair.

"How…"

"I…"

Gilbert balled up his fist, "You must be pretty angry at me, I know. I…I'm still alive." He looked up, but Ludwig's head was hanging down. "Guess you noticed these grotesque marks too. This is why I didn't want to show anybody. Pretty…pretty bad, right?" Ludwig didn't respond or move, "Damn it, West…I'm right here, you know. Say something! Are you here just to see if I was dead?"

"Shut up!"

Gilbert stopped and Ludwig covered his mouth, "Oh, I guess you really did. S-sorry." They were quiet for about five minutes before Gilbert spoke up again, "You don't have to be here if you don't want to. You can leave now and I'll stay out of your life from now on…"

"I said shut up!"

"T-then get the hell out of my room!"

Ludwig pulled at his hair, "No! I…I don't want to leave! Please! Damn it, Gilbert! I don't know what to say!" Gilbert sighed, "You don't have to say an-" "But I _want_ to say something to you, don't you understand? But if I do…if…"

"West, look at me."

"No! I can't! Not after what I said to you…"

"Ludwig, I said look at me right now!"

He looked up and saw Gilbert's weak looking face. Ludwig couldn't believe how dead he looked, "Now tell me what you really want to say." Ludwig's face was slowly turning a darker shade of red and he covered his eyes, "No, I…please…" Gilbert started scratching his cast and Ludwig broke down.

"NO! Don't do that! Please, anything but that!"

"Huh? I was ju-"

"No…d-don't…not again! Please!"

Ludwig was now completely in tears. Gilbert pulled him closer and Ludwig threw himself on the brother's chest and cried as hard as he could, chanting "Please don't die" over and over again. As emotional as it was, Gilbert couldn't help but laugh. It's been years since he last saw his younger brother cry and he had to admit that it was very cute, "No, no, I'm not dead just yet."

After Ludwig finished crying, he kept his face hidden. He was completely embarrassed by his actions and didn't want his brother to see his face. He decided to stay very still and hope that Gilbert would think he fell asleep, "Hey West, you okay? You're not sleeping, are you? Wake up."

Ludwig sighed and shook his head, "Come on, West. Let your big brother see you!" He slowly lifted up his head and Gilbert was immediately taken in by his brother's flushed, tear stained face, "Too fucking cute!" He kissed Ludwig's forehead numerous times while messing up his hair more.

He sat up, "I'm too old to be cute." "Nuh uh! How do you explain Feli? Anyways, you look as cute as you did back then, all clingy and crying to your awesome big brother! So cute~!" Ludwig wiped his eyes and crossed his arms, "For your information, when you're as childish as Feliciano then everything you do will appear cute!"

"Did…did you just admit that you think Feli is cute?"

Ludwig stood up to walk away and Gilbert grabbed his arm, "Whaaat? Did I say something wrong? Kesesesese!" Ludwig gasped when he saw the arm, "Seriously, West? You already saw my arm before, so why are you still freaked out by this?"

Sitting back down, Ludwig held up Gilbert's arm, "Just because you're used to looking at it doesn't mean I am!" He stared at the injured arm and started tearing up again, "W-West, shit! I told you that I'm fine! So please, calm down!"

He wiped his eyes again, "Why couldn't you just masturbate when you're alone like everyone else?" Gilbert was almost speechless, "I…ignoring the fucking obvious…I don't know about you or anybody else, but if you jerk off while you're feeling depressed then you have worse problems than me!"

They had a good laugh at that and Ludwig was feeling better, but he still needed to know, "Why are you depressed, Bruder?" That seemed to surprise Gilbert, "I…you know, haven't you even been depressed before?" He wasn't sure how to answer, so he answered a question with a question which Ludwig didn't like.

"I didn't mean it like that. I'll rephrase it, how can you be so depressed that you'd hurt yourself?"

It took a few minutes before Gilbert answered, "I've been through too much shit for you to understand. You wouldn't understand the pain I go through everyday with no way to let it out." "Then talk to me!" Ludwig balled up his fist, "Talk to me! If it's too hard to talk with your friends about it, then talk to me! You can't do this anymore, Gilbert!"

Gilbert started scratching on his cast more, "I…West, you don't understand…" Ludwig stood up, "Then _help_ me understand!" He covered his eyes with his hand, "Please don't do _that_ to yourself anymore, promise me." Gilbert looked down at his fingers. His fingernails were getting kind of long…

"Bruder, promise me!"

Gilbert was feeling really bad, "West, I…what am I…?" Hearing his brother hold back a sob made his heart sink, "S-sure, West. I won't. I'll do a-anything for you." Ludwig moved his hand and gave his brother a giant smile that he hadn't seen him make since Ludwig was a little kid. For some reason, that smile made Gilbert feel worse.

Ludwig hugged him and walked toward the door, "I love you, Bruder. Remember that!" Gilbert knew that his brother was riding on his good mood high or he'd never say anything close to that so easily, "Of course! Why wouldn't you? Kesesese!"

When Ludwig walked out of the room, he saw his older brothers surrounding Feliciano. Some were sweet talking him while some of the others messing with him. One brother was constantly poking his cheek. Ludwig grabbed Feliciano, took him down the stairs, and led him outside to the hospital's courtyard.

When they were far enough, Ludwig stopped with his friend behind him, "Ludwig? Is something wrong?" When Ludwig said nothing Feliciano got more worried, "Ludwig?" "Gilbert, he…" Ludwig quickly spun around and hugged Feliciano and started crying. To say Feliciano was surprised was an understatement. His whole body completely froze as Ludwig cried harder and squeezed tighter.

"Ludwig, I can't breathe…ve…"

He nodded and eased up and Feliciano led them to a nearby bench, "Are you okay now, Ludwig? Is Gilbert alright?" Ludwig sniffed and nodded, "Ja, Bruder…Gilbert is fine. More then fine!" "Really?" The little Italian boy smiled as he wiped the tears from Ludwig's eyes.

"Yes! And better yet he promised me that he wouldn't cut himself anymore!"

"…R-really? Just like that?"

Ludwig smile faltered a little, "Well, yeah. What do you mean by that?" Feliciano felt like hitting himself. He just had to ruin quite possibly the best moment he'll ever have with Ludwig, but he needed to finish what he started, "I just meant that…doesn't it all seem too sudden?"

The smile was now gone, "Feliciano, stop it. You weren't there with me, so you wouldn't know how my brother feels now." "But, I-" "I said, stop it!" Feliciano jumped at that last outburst, but then he sighed. Ludwig pulled him closer, "My brother is fine now. That's all that matters. I've been so angry for so long that I don't want this feeling to end, so please don't ruin this."

Once again, Feliciano was completely confused. It was only at times like this that Feliciano could see more than Ludwig. It was too hard to believe that Gilbert would stop doing something that he's been doing for who knows how long right away. Feliciano also understood that Ludwig was very happy that his brother was alive, so he decided to nod his head and say nothing.

A few minutes later, Ludwig stood up and pulled Feliciano up and the two walked back into the hospital and ran into Ludwig's family in the front lobby, "Where is everyone going?" One of the older brothers walked up, "Actually, we were going to leave." "Leave?"

Another brother crossed his arms, "Luddy, we can't stay in the hospital forever. Opa told us to go on ahead while he talked with Gil, so you can go back up if you want. But hurry up because we're still gonna go." Ludwig nodded and looked at Feliciano, "Don't worry. I'll wait for you down here." He smiled and got up the elevator.

As he walked out of the elevator, Ludwig caught his grandfather about to go in, "Ludwig, what are you doing back here? We're about to leave." "I know, but just I need to tell Bruder something." Ludwig rushed off to his brother's room before his grandfather could say another word.

Ludwig slowly opened the door to his brother's room and saw the doctor holding Gilbert's injured arm and Gilbert shivering a little, "Yeah, it's been really hurting a lot suddenly…" The doctor sighed, "Guess, I'll have…oh, looks like you have another visitor!" The doctor quickly put the cast back on and turned around.

Gilbert looked at the door and gave a huge grin, "West! I thought you left. What are you doing back here?" Ludwig gave the doctor a huge death glare as they left the room, "G-Gilbert, please keep it short. I still need to finish you check up." Gilbert waved the doctor off with his good hand, "I know, I know. This _will_ be short, right?" Ludwig crossed his arms and grumbled and the doctor left.

The two brothers stared at each other for awhile before Gilbert cleared his throat, "So…was there something you wanted to tell me?" Ludwig didn't really know why he came back to see his brother. All he knew was that he didn't want to leave him alone again. As Ludwig tried to figure out what he wanted to say, Gilbert continued to stare at his fingernails, _Damn it! Damn it all! Why did he have to come back! Now…now I…_

Gilbert sighed, "H-hey, West? Could you…do me a little favor?" Ludwig looked up, "Yes?" Gilbert closed eyes and bit his lip, "I…could you bring me my nail filer from home?" Ludwig was confused, "A nail filer? Why? Can't you get the doctor to do it for you?"

Gilbert laughed, "Oh West, do you really think that a hospital would provide a manicure service? Anyways, if I told the doctors they would probably use scissors or some crazy shit. Do you really trust the doctors enough for them to do something like that?" Ludwig already knew the answer to that one. Not only had the doctor claim that Gilbert had some mental problems, but he heard Gilbert just say that he was in pain despite being in the doctor's care. Logic was now completely lost on Ludwig.

Ludwig noticed that his brother's nails were starting to get a little long. Long enough that he might even scratch himself and get more cuts, "Of course, Bruder! Of course! I could bring my emery board the nex-" "Eww! Don't be gross, West! No offense, but I wanna use my _own_ file if you know what I mean." Ludwig rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Where is it?"

As Gilbert tried to remember, he started scratching his nose. Ludwig quickly grabbed that hand, "I'll just buy you a new one…" "No! I mean, I like my nail file…it's special! Anyways, it's in the bathroom. In the medicine cabinet! If nothing else, bring that for me." He hugged his brother, "Of course, Gilbert. I promise to bring it the next time I come to see you." Gilbert frowned.

"Of course you will."


	11. Unwanted Help

Ludwig woke up at seven the next morning and realized that his older brother was sleeping on the floor instead of the bed for reasons Ludwig was too sleepy to find out. He walked over to Gilbert's room and sighed. Once they returned from the hospital, his grandfather did his best to clean the blood stains on the ground. It disturbed him enough to look away from the room.

He went in the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet and took out the nail file. He would have taken it after they came back, but his brothers bothered him that whole day. He wanted to give it to Gilbert as soon as possible, but he didn't want to bother his grandfather any further by waking him up so early and would rather not have him know that he was doing Gilbert any favors. So, he decided to bother Roderich.

The Austrian boy grumbled as he looked at his phone, "Ludwig, why are you ca…did something happen again?" "What? No, calm down. I just need a ride to the hospital." Roderich sat up on his bed and tried fixing his hair, "As flattered as I am that you'd like _me_ to drive you anywhere, why not ask Grandfather or one of your brothers?"

If he was Gilbert he'd tell him something like, "Because I only want you~!" but he wasn't that desperate…yet, "They're supposed to be on vacation of sorts and I don't want to disturb them any further and…and you're my f-favorite cousin and…and…you're the best p-pian…uh…" "Alright, I'll do it! You know, Francis is much better at fla…."

Roderich almost dropped his phone because, "I forgot to tell Francis and Antonio!" Before Ludwig could reply, Roderich hung up and called Francis, "Francis, Francis, I am so _so_ sorry I didn't call you sooner!"

Francis didn't even get a chance to greet him, but wasn't upset, "Why Roderich, you're the last person I'd think of who'd call me so early in the morning wanting me~!" "No, I-" "Unfortunately, I am driving right now, on my way to my job." "Ye-" "I know, a young man like me working on a Sunday morning? Quite tragic! There should be a la-"

"Gilbert's in the hospital!"

"…E-excusez-moi?"

"I…I'm so sorry I didn't tell you right away, but he's been hospitalized since Friday night and…"

Francis immediately pulled over to the side of the road, "Since Friday? Ç'est une blague ou quoi? I'm calling Antonio, so don't hang up!" Roderich felt bad that he forgot to tell Gilbert's best friends that he was in the hospital this whole time. Must have been all of the stress.

Francis came back with Antonio on the other line, "Roderich, Franny just told me that Gil Gil is in the hospital! What happened?" Suddenly, someone on Antonio end was yelling at him in Spanish and he tried to calm them down, "I'm sorry guys, but I'm at work right now…but it's fine, I can talk!" The yelling got louder and angrier, but Antonio encouraged them to continue.

After telling them all that happened, there was a long pause until Francis spoke up, "Antonio, I'm going to pick you up from your job after I call work. Do you think you could get out right now?" "Of course! Going now!" "Roderich, I'm coming to pick you and Ludwig up next, so get ready." Roderich was pretty surprised by how commanding Francis turned out to be and told him that he'll be ready.

When Roderich got in the back seat of Francis' car, there was a very uncomfortable silence inside. He decided to break the tension, "S-so Antonio, how did you get out of work?" He looked out the window, "I told them that my friend was in the hospital dying and fell to the ground crying until they were forced to make me leave." "O-oh…I see."

A few seconds later, Antonio burst into tears, "G-Gilb-b-bert! P-p-p-p-por qu-qué?" Francis gripped the steering wheel harder, "Antonio, I thought I told you to stay quiet?" Antonio shook his head, "N-no, Franny! Why would Gil Gil d-do that? He…He…"

"Shut up!"

Roderich was completely confused by Francis' complete attitude change, "Francis, what the hell is wrong with you? Can't you see that he's understandably upset?" Francis pressed hard on the brakes, "Je m'en fous!" When Ludwig sat next to Roderich, it startled everyone, "Ludwig, where did you come from?" "Uh, you're parked at my house." Francis sighed and drove to the hospital.

Ludwig was glad that he could read the atmosphere because he knew there was something very wrong with everyone in the car. Actually, he wished he couldn't read the atmosphere and that he could say something uplifting like Feliciano would usually do. In fact, he wished Feliciano was there now. He really should have called him.

As soon as they parked, Antonio locked the doors and grabbed Francis' hand, "We're not getting out until you tell me what the hell is wrong with you!" Francis made a quick glance at Ludwig, "Antonio, now is not the time. Not in front of…you know…" "No! I get that you're upset, we all are. So why, why are you acting like such an asshole?" Francis crossed his arms and tried to stealthily unlock the door, but Antonio stopped him.

"Alright, fine! I knew it, okay? I knew that Gilbert would do something like this! It was a long time coming!"

Antonio was horrified and Roderich and Ludwig were confused, so Roderich put his hand on his friend's shoulder, "Francis, please explain what you mean." He gave a heavy sigh, "Gilbert…he's seemed so depressed for so long. I've known about it, yet I didn't do anything. Of course I knew he might do something stupid one day, but kill himself? He is such a selfish bastard! How could I not be upset at such foolishness? It pisses me off that I couldn't do anything for him before…this. You have no reason to be sad when I was the one who saw it coming and did nothing!"

Antonio cried and hugged him, "Francis, it's not your fault!" As he cried, Francis patted his back and Ludwig cleared his throat, "I, uh, I think it might make you feel better if you talked to him yourself." Antonio nodded and unlocked the doors and they made their way to Gilbert's room.

Roderich called ahead to make sure that he could visit this early, so Gilbert already knew that he was coming. Even so, he still fell asleep while the doctor was examining his arm, "Gilbert, I know it's early, but you need to wake up for…oh, your guests are already here." "Uh, huh? Guests?"

Ludwig and Roderich were at the door, "Roddy! You stuck-up bastard, you didn't tell me you brought West with you!" The doctor left with a smile, but Ludwig shot another glare their way and walked up to his brother while Roderich put his hands on his hips, "Gilbert, don't be rude! Well, anyway, we're not the only ones here today." He motioned for the other two.

Gilbert was shocked to see them and hid his arms, "Franny? Tonio? I can't believe it! How the hell are you guys? It's been, like, forever!" Antonio froze in place while Francis covered his mouth and moved closer, "No, no, th-that's not…you look so terrible!" Roderich made another motion for Ludwig and himself to leave the room.

Francis, with his mouth still covered, started to cry, "How…how could you?" He grabbed the covered arms, "You're so beautiful! What would possess you to do this? My beautiful…" Gilbert knew that his friend was a dramatic person, but he never actually saw him honestly cry, "H-hey, Francis, come on. I'm fine, see? It's just a few marks."

"La mierda del toro."

Gilbert looked up, "Huh? What was that, Tonio?" Antonio looked straight at him, "What's the matter? What the hell, Gilbert? How stupid could you get? I know that we all said we fucking hated each other in the past, but to kill yourself? Do you really…I just don't understand!" He sat down and covered his face.

Francis tried to speak, "A-Ant-tonio, what h-happen? You were c-crying earlier!" Antonio let out a huge sigh and gave a weak smile, "I'm tired of crying…Gilbert, Francis said he knew…he knew how sad and depressed you were and he was so stressed out about. But you know what, so was I! I knew it too! Just…" He sighed again and looked Gilbert straight in the eye again.

"Gilbert, was there anything we could have done to stop you? Help you?"

Gilbert was speechless. _Was_ there anything Antonio or Francis could have done to stop or help him? He felt as if he let his best friends down somehow and that he had no way of asking for their forgiveness except for saying, "I…I'm sorry…" Francis hugged him, "I'm sorry I got so emotional. I just get that way when I see beautiful things get ruined!" "Beautiful? Don't you mean 'awesome'?"

The two of them laughed then looked at Antonio, "Aw come on, Tonio! You never look good without that smile of yours!" He pouted, "Look good? I remember when you used to tell me that my smile was stupid!" "No, that was Lovino." "No, it's you _and_ Lovino!"

They stayed silent until Francis began laughing and then the other two started laughing. Antonio walked up to him and held his unoccupied hand, "Roderich told us what happened." "Obviously…" "And I'm pretty sure everyone has told you this, but please never hurt yourself like this again! I don't want you to get hurt or die."

Gilbert pouted, "Why does everyone have to be so freaking sappy?" Francis gave a very sly smile and moved much closer to Gilbert, "But it is true! If you…damage all of this," he slowly ran his hand along Gilbert's arm to his face, "what else would I have to love?" Gilbert glared, "You're an idiot."

Francis then rubbed his face on Gilbert's, "Just kidding! You know I'll still love you no matter how cut up you are! Though I would prefer if you were not!" Gilbert screamed, "Gaaaah! Stop scratching me with your face! You'll cut me!" Antonio laughed, "Said the guy who purposely cut himself!"

Gilbert growled and Francis chuckled, "Should have seen that joke coming~!" "Hey, I would never touch the money maker!" He pushed the scratchy face away and felt his own. It didn't actually hurt that much but he couldn't tell if he actually got scratched. That's when he realized something.

"Hey, don't you two fuckers work today?"

Francis and Antonio looked at each other and smiled, "With you in the hospital, of course not~!" Gilbert covered his face, "You two are so gonna get fired…"

…

Before Ludwig and Roderich left the room, Ludwig grabbed Gilbert's cell phone that was on a table next to him. As he was waiting in the hall with Roderich, Ludwig was contemplating whether or not he should call Yekaterina. He may not like the girl, but she probably had a right to know what happened to Gilbert.

Ludwig got up, "I'm going to bathroom." Roderich nodded and Ludwig walked around a corner and when he was far enough he looked at the phone and got immediately confused by the weird names Gilbert gave people. The two closest ones he assumed were for Yekaterina was 'Big Boobs' and 'Kat', so Ludwig chose the former first.

"Allo? May I ask who is calling?"

Ludwig froze. It was Ivan. He then realized that he must have called the home number instead of the cell phone. Well, he couldn't hang up now, "H-hello, may I s-speak to Yekaterina please?" He felt so awkward asking a classmate he hardly talks to for their sister.

"Hmm….nyet~!"

With that, Ivan hung up. If he didn't have his brother's phone he'd break it in anger. After calming down, he called the 'Kat' number. "A-allo? Gilbert?" He sighed in relief, "This is Yekaterina, ja?" She froze, "Who…who is this?" He almost forgot he was using his brother's phone, "This is Gilbert's brother Ludwig. I wanted to let you know that my brother's in the hospital."

"The hospital? What happened to him? Is he…is he okay?"

"Yes, he's fine. He…he…he had an accident with a knife and cut his wrist, but h-"

"NO!"

She dropped her phone, fell to the ground, grabbed her arm, and started chanting 'no' in as many languages as she knew. Ivan heard the yell from her room and knocked on the door, "Katyusha, what's wrong? Did something happen to you?" She grabbed the phone again, "Please, I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry! Gilbert's in the hospital because of me!" She hung up and cried.

Ludwig didn't understand a bit of what just happened, but he knew to never call her again. When Ludwig went back, Roderich was gone and Antonio and Francis were in his place, "Where did Roderich go?" Antonio opened his mouth, but Francis stopped him, "Roderich? Oh yes, he is in there with Gilbert. Probably making out with him right now~!" He said that with a wink.

Ludwig wasn't stupid, so he crossed his arms and glared. Francis continued to smile and look at the door, which bothered Ludwig. Just because Francis was lying to him doesn't mean he still couldn't check on Gilbert. So Ludwig hurried into Gilbert's room, causing Francis and Antonio to snicker.

When he went in the room, he saw Roderich bending his head down to Gilbert's face, "Wh-what's going on in here?" Roderich frowned, "Well, I _was_ checking on Gilbert's face until you came in here shouting! So very rude, Ludwig." Ludwig almost backed down, but it just looked too odd, "Checking his face? What does that even mean?"

Gilbert pointed to his cheek, "Right here. Francis scratched me with his stupid beard and Roddy wanted to check it out." Roderich huffed, "You don't know where that face has been! He could give you something!" "Kesesese, then it's probably already too late~!"

Roderich's face got red, "Then…what? I am not gonna stand here and hear anymore of your v-vulgar…talk!" Gilbert laughed loudly as Roderich stormed out of the room, "Haa, Roderich sure is something else. So, what do you want, West?" Ludwig almost forgot why he was there, "I, um, brought something for you."

He pulled out the nail file and handed it to his brother. Gilbert almost didn't want it, but he took it anyways, "Oh, good…I mean, thank you, West." Ludwig smiled and sat next to him, "So, how are they treating you?" He still felt uncomfortable with Ludwig acting so friendly suddenly, "Good, I guess…"

Ludwig tensed up, "You guess?" Gilbert started filing his nails, "Uh, no. No, it's all good, right…" He really wanted Ludwig to leave because he already felt uncomfortable that he lied to him to get the nail file and also felt bad about making his tough brother cry in the first place, "Sooo, aren't you tired right now? It's still so early."

"It's almost noon."

Gilbert looked at the clock, "Damn, you're right…" Ludwig put his hand on Gilbert's shoulder, "I'm sorry. I guess I should've taken the hint." He got up and walked toward the door, "West, wait!" He nodded, "Of course, you're hospitalized and you need as much rest as possible. You did lose a lot of blood after all." Did he just make his younger brother feel unwanted?

"Hey, West! You…you really are an awesome little brother."

"…!"

Ludwig quickly looked away so his brother wouldn't see his red face, "I-is that so? I, uh, I gotta go now. See you soon!" He quickly walked past everybody, "Let's go! My brother is asleep, so come on." He doesn't remember the last time Gilbert has ever called him awesome. As stupid as it sounded, he never felt more proud than he did at that moment.

Gilbert felt like shit. He just made his brother an accomplice by bringing in something he wasn't supposed to. Ludwig got so flustered that he forgot to take back the file. The one with the sharper than usual tip. The tip that Ludwig should've noticed was sharp, but probably didn't because he was so happy to do anything for his hospitalized brother. Yeah, he felt like shit.

Yekaterina was still in her room crying on the floor when Ivan opened her door, "V-Vanya! How d-did you get in here?" Ivan tossed up and down her doorknob in his hand, "Never mind that, what just happened? Why were you yelling?" He looked on the ground and saw her phone and cryptically said, "Who called you?"

She shook her head, "N-no one!" He sighed and crouched down, "Please don't lie to your baby brother like that. Do you wanna make me sad and cry into the scarf that you made for me?" Once she saw the tears in his eyes, Katyusha cried again, "It's Gilbert! Gilbert almost died!"

Ivan almost fell backward, "Di-di-died?" She nodded, "And I…I…" Ivan stood up and turned around. He couldn't have Gilbert die. Not die. Then he remembered something and lifted his sister off the ground, "Katyusha, do you know something about this?" The look in Ivan's eyes was of pure anger, and it made Katyusha completely fear for her life if she didn't tell him everything.

…

As soon as Ludwig got back home, his older brothers were preparing to go back to their places of residence and were also planning on making a last minute trip to the hospital. As soon as he made it to his room, his grandfather was there waiting for him, "Ludwig! Where did you go this morning?"

It suddenly occurred to him that he snuck out of the house and told no one where he went, which is why he thought it was strange that his brothers were giving him strange looks when he walked in the house. He explained about going to the hospital with the others and Opa Beilschmidt frowned, "You know that you should've told me you were going, even if it was to see your brother." "I know, sir."

Opa Beilschmidt grabbed Ludwig's arm and pulled him in his room, "Ludwig, I already told your brothers this but I'm going to start letting Gilbert see a therapist." "…Why?" Ludwig was honestly confused, which worried his grandfather, "Ludwig, please don't act that way. You were there when it happened! Gilbert's going to need some help."

Ludwig couldn't believe what he was hearing, "How can you say that? There is nothing wrong with Gilbert!" "Don't raise your voice at me! Ludwig…please understand th-" Ludwig backed away, "He told me himself that he wouldn't do it anymore. Can't you trust him? He promised!"

"What if he was lying to you?"

He knew it wasn't the right thing to say, but it was true. Unfortunately, Ludwig didn't agree, "Grandfather, why? How could you say that? You really don't trust him…it's no wonder he hurt himself all the time!" Ludwig ran out the room and out of the house. He couldn't believe he just yelled at his own grandfather, but he didn't regret it.

He believed in his brother and didn't think he had any mental problems. In fact, it was thoughts like that which made him yell at Gilbert in the first place and forced him to try to kill himself. Ludwig didn't really get too far before Opa Beilschmidt caught up to him, "Ludwig, please listen. I am not angry with you and, more importantly, I trust Gilbert. I just don't think he trusts himself."

Ludwig got ready to run again, but his grandfather stopped him, "Please, just listen to this old man. I…can't chase after young kids anymore…" Ludwig sighed and frowned, "What is it…sir?" He was thankful he didn't have to run anymore, "Ludwig, I'm only doing this because I love Gilbert. He's just lost and confused and he needs someone outside of his family and friends to help him. I just need your support. I know for a fact that Gilbert will reject the idea, so I also need you to convince him otherwise. Can you at least do this for me? If not for me then do it for your brother!"

Honestly, Ludwig didn't buy it, but agreed so that his grandfather would stop bothering him. Maybe he's been gathering too many bad habits from Gilbert or was still just a kid, but he might just keep it all to himself. He believes in Gilbert and intends to let him know that he still does.

"Grandfather, later tonight can we visit Gilbert again. I want to tell him what you told me!"

That's what he'd like his grandfather to believe, "Sorry Ludwig, but school is tomorrow and I need to catch up on some work." "But aren't you on vacation?" "It was a business trip…we can see your brother tomorrow afternoon if that makes you feel any better. Now, don't you have some homework to do?"

He didn't like how his grandfather made it seem like visiting Gilbert was a bother. At least he wasn't lying this way, but he was still going to see Gilbert before then.

…

The next morning, Ludwig made sure he left home as soon as his grandfather was gone and took the spare car, the broken one he isn't supposed to drive, to the hospital. He didn't want to make Feliciano worry too much, so he left a note on the door with his homework just in case he didn't get back in time. He knew for a fact that Gilbert was still asleep, but he didn't care. He needed to talk to him now.

When he was next to the hospital room Ludwig heard a loud commotion going on from inside, like a struggle. He heard something like, "Stop!" and "Get away!" which made Ludwig rush inside and was stunned by what he saw.

The doctor and a nurse were holding Gilbert down. The doctor was holding Gilbert's right arm, the injured one, and the nurse was holding his body and other arm down. The worst part was that Gilbert was holding the nail file in his left hand and that his exposed right hip has fresh cuts.

"B-bruder? What is…"

"West?"

Gilbert was distracted long enough for the nurse to take the file out of his hands. Ludwig was completely at a loss. Gilbert utterly broke his promise. He said he would never cut himself again, but there it is, "Bruder…how could you?" He felt extremely betrayed. The look of instant betrayal on Ludwig's face was enough to send Gilbert's emotions over the edge.

"NO! Stop looking at ME!"

Gilbert cried. For the first time in years he cried. He cried and screamed and covered his body so that no one could see him. When the doctor and nurse tried to calm him down, he attacked and forced them away, "Leave me alone! Please…stop looking at me, damn it! Go away!" He swung his arm around so much that he hurt himself.

Watching him like that made all of the feelings of betrayal and mistrust leave Ludwig. His grandfather was right, Gilbert really did need help and at the moment he needed _his_ help. Before the doctor tried to get some outside help, Ludwig stopped them and went to his brother.

"Gilbert, please stop."

Gilbert tried to cover himself again, but Ludwig pulled the sheets away, "Bruder, stop this! It's okay." He hugged him, but Gilbert punched his head, "No it's not! It's not! Don't fucking touch me!" Ludwig smiled, "Your punches are still too weak. Weaker than before. You need to calm down and relax. It really is okay, Bruder."

Gilbert went limp and continued crying with Ludwig holding him tightly as the doctor dressed his wounds and left to contact their grandfather. Gilbert now understood how Ludwig felt when he cried like crazy before, except he felt a bit more refreshed as if a huge weight had been lifted. He embarrassingly hid his face in Ludwig chest.

"Uh, thanks…"

Ludwig patted his back, "What? I can't hear you. Move so I can proper hear you." "No! I feel safe in my little brother's muscley arms. So safe~!" Ludwig immediately pushed him away, "Don't be creepy!" Seeing Gilbert laugh made him feel better, but his tear stained face still broke his heart.

He cleared his throat and wiped Gilbert's face, "Bruder, you broke your promise to me." Gilbert looked away, "I know…" Ludwig straightened up, "In that case, you have to promise me something else." "Something…like what?" He really hoped he won't regret saying this, "I, uh, promise me that you'll see a doctor about this."

Gilbert stared at him for a few seconds before inching away, "Wh-what the hell are you talking about? You better not mean what I think you mean. Did the old man put you up to this! I already have a doctor, so it's fine!" Ludwig knew this would happen, "Bruder, come on. Don't act childish, you know better than anyone that you need some help." "Get the fuck out of my room!"

Of course it wasn't going to be easy, which is why Ludwig wasn't mad, "Gilbert, you were just cutting your leg with a nail filer at the break of dawn." "Middle of the night." "Middle of…what? Anyways, you had two people holding you down while your lower half was bleeding and…exposed…"

Gilbert covered up a bit more, "Hey, I'm still wearing underwear! You're lucky you're my brother or I'd charge you for looking!" "Bruder, please stay on track!" Ludwig didn't see much since he wasn't really trying to see anything at the time and it all happened so fast, "Wait, why are you making me think about this? Just promise me that you'll at least strongly consider it!"

As much as he didn't want to, Gilbert sighed and nodded, "Fine, I'll strongly consider it…and wipe that smile off your face! Shit, such a child." Ludwig laughed, "Yeah, _I'm_ the child!" The doctor walked in a cleared their throat, "Yes, Ludwig was it? I just contacted your grandfather and he said that he'll be waiting for you at your school."

Ludwig immediately paled and Gilbert was confused, "Wait a minute, shouldn't you be at lunch right now?"


	12. Earn that Happy Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it! The last chapter! Took nine years and a worldwide pandemic, but I finally did it! Of course, I can't tell all of you how sorry I am for the complete lack of updates. I mean, how can someone be so busy for nine years?! Wait…life. Yes, life is the correct answer to that question. Tee hee~!
> 
> Enough of the self loathing! I would like to sincerely thank the people who stuck with this story until the end because damn it, I take forever! And another thanks to all of those who just started reading this now. Love you all! Now let's finish this thing! Extra-long final chapter!

Ludwig slowly made his way to the vice principal's office. Since it was lunch time, the halls where semi filled with students. He made sure that none of his friends or anyone he knows was around since he basically skipped school. Ludwig was told that his grandfather was ready to see him, so he moved slower and slower to the door. Unlike Gilbert and some of his older brothers, he doesn't intentional try to get in trouble. Now he was very nervous. As he slowly opened the door, his grandfather was standing in front of his desk with his arms crossed.

"…How was Gilbert?"

Ludwig walked in and turned around to close the door, "I said, how was your brother?" "Wouldn't you already know?" "What did you say?" Ludwig had no idea why he said that. He was so nervous that he blurted out the first thing that came to his mind. "He's fine. I said, Bruder's fine." He was so afraid of turning to face his grandfather.

"Ludwig, come over here."

He squeezed his eyes shut and inhaled before finally turning and walking up. Opa Beilschmidt straightened up and rose an eyebrow and Ludwig looked away, "Uh, Gilbert said that he'll…consider seeing a therapist." Ludwig then saw his grandfather back up to lean against his desk and covered his face with hands.

"Ludwig, I'm so disappointed in you."

Since he wasn't being looked at, Ludwig sneered, "Excuse me? Yesterday, you told m-" "Ludwig! Ludwig…first, you didn't tell me, tell anyone that you were going to see your brother this morning by _yourself_. Second, you used the _broken_ car which could have broken down at any point on your way there or here!" The two of them stared down at each other for a while until the vice principal slammed his fist on the desk.

"And third…you brought you brother something _sharp_ from the house! He tried to kill himself with a knife and you give him something sharp? What's wrong with you?!"

Ludwig flinched. He could've lied and told him that it wasn't him, but the guilt was too much and Ludwig closed his eyes and turned away, "I…I didn't mean…" Opa sighed, "I _am_ glad that the situation this morning opened up your eyes. Regardless, you brought him something you knew you weren't supposed to bring without telling anybody! What if your brother cut too deep again? Or got infection from that cut or worse? What were you thinking?!" Ludwig quickly covered his eyes with his hand, trying to stop his emerging tears.

_I feel like such a child!_

Ludwig slowly opened his mouth, "S-s-sorry." He waited for his grandson to compose himself, "Ludwig…thank you, for talking with your older brother. We all know that he can be handful, but thank you for helping him…albeit in the most asinine way possible." Ludwig wiped his eyes and looked down, too embarrassed to look at his grandfather.

Said grandfather walked around his desk and sat down, "Ludwig, I want you to go back home. You already missed half the day and I know that you must be feeling emotionally drained after all that has happened." Ludwig looked up surprised, not expecting to hear that he could skip the rest of his classes.

"That being said, as soon as you get home, you are to leave your driver's license on the table with the car's keys. I'll give them back when I deem appropriate."

Ludwig figured as much and nodded. "You are also not allowed to visit Gilbert on your own and you're also not allowed to be alone his him in the hospital either." "What?!" "I already spoke with his doctors about this. You don't seriously expect me to trust the two of you alone after that stunt the both of you pulled, did you?"

The younger of the two crossed his arm with a huff and Opa coughed to cover up a laugh, "Uh, on that note…your brother should be out in two days." "WHAT?!" "I know what you're going to ask and no, I still can't trust you to see Gilbert alone in spite of the fact he'll be back soon." He then sat back, "On that note, we need to clean up the house for when he returns. You know, hide or remove anything that could be used for…you get what I mean, right?"

Ludwig looks away again and sighs, "Yes sir. But I won't go through the stuff in his room." "Don't worry about his room, I already took away anything that looked like it could be harmful to himself." Ludwig grimaced at that. "No, Ludwig, I did not try to invade his privacy, but what did you except me to do after cleaning up my own grandson's blood…"

It wasn't until that moment that Ludwig hadn't really thought about how his grandfather was taking everything that's happened. His own grandson was hospitalized while he out of town. At least he was there, surrounded by friends, while his grandfather had to think the worst as he made his way back to them and then deal with the doctors, his brothers showing up, and all of this mess. He could see the stress in the much older man's face.

"I understand. I'll do what I can once I get back."

Even though he isn't a very emotional person, Ludwig felt it was necessary to walk up to his sitting grandfather and hug him, no matter how stilted it was. "Thank you, Opa." "I…uh…yes." He pats his grandson's head, "Well, I should get back to work now and you should head home. Make sure that you go straight back, no stops. Alright?" Ludwig smiles, "Okay."

Once he leaves, Ludwig is hailed by the principal next to his office, "Oh, Principal Vargas. What is it, sir?" The principal frowned, "Ludwig, you don't have to be so formal around me when no one's around…" He then loosened his posture, "Okay, what is it, Mr. Vargas?"

The older Vargas sighed and put his hands on Ludwig's shoulders, "I already talked with Feli, but I wanted to ask you personally. Are you okay?" He couldn't help but smile, "I'm alright, sir. I'm sorry for not showing up this morning, but I wan-" "Wanted to see your older brother again, right? Such a wonderful family! Sometimes I wish Lovi was as well behaved as you!"

He could see that the old man was going to ramble on, "I-If you don't mind, I really should be getting back…" "To class?" "Actually, back home. Opa, I mean, my grandfather let me take the rest of the day off." Vargas lowered his eyebrows, "Did he now…well, I'm not gonna keep you any longer. I'll see you tomorrow, I hope!" "Yes, sir."

As he watched the boy walk out of the hall, Vargas slowly opened up the vice principal's door and saw his friend resting his elbows on the desk with his hands covering his face. He closed the door and knocked on it before opening it up again, "Hey, buddy. You busy?"

Beilschmidt straightened up in his chair, "Sorry, just taking a little break." Vargas stands at the other side of the desk, "Just saw Ludwig. You let him go home?" "I already told you what happened earlier. There was no way he would be able concentrate on his studies after what happened this morning…what's with that goofy look?" "Hee hee, you're the one who always say I dote on _my_ grandsons too much, but look at you. Mr. Vice Principal telling a student to stay home~!"

Mr. Vice Principal crossed his arms, "Any decent educator would suggest the same thing, given the circumstances…" Vargas noticed his friend now seemed sad, "Speaking of, I have a list of some really good therapists. I underlined the one that I personally recommend, but you can check them all out, just in case." "You…" "Hey, I know that you've been having a really hard time and decided to help out a little. Any decent friend would do the same thing, no matter the circumstances." Beilschmidt grimaced and rests his head on his hands again, "Damn it. I…I-I don't deserve a friend…like you." Vargas sat on the desk and stretched his arm to rest his hand on his friend's head.

Meanwhile, as Ludwig tried to make his way back without being seen, he suddenly heard a deep voice yell out, "Hey!" He jumped and couldn't help looking for that familiar voice until he saw his taller cousin approach him, "Damnn! I mean, B-Berwald! Were you…waiting for me?"

The tall Swedish boy nods, "Heard about Gilbert. He's okay?" Berwald knotted his eyebrows which would've made him look extremely angry had he not voiced his concerns. "Uhh, y-yes. He's fine now." "Can I see him?" "Um…" Berwald looked away and Ludwig guessed that the other boy might be nervous, "That's fine, I can…oh, sorry. I can't, not allowed to drive around in the car."

Ludwig didn't really want to elaborate, but Berwald nods, "You took my big brother's old car." "Yeah, so now I have to go straight home and give up my license…oh, sorry." He wasn't sure why he was rambling, but Berwald didn't seem to mind. "Got a ride. Can we pick you up?" "I'll have to ask Opa first. But I'll let you know later today." The bell rings and the taller boy nods and walks away. Ludwig then exhales without realizing and covers his mouth, hoping his cousin didn't hear that.

Later that afternoon, after cleaning up as much as he could, he called his grandfather to let him know about Berwald visiting Gilbert. He promised that he wouldn't see his brother alone and, with much hesitation, he was given permission. Ludwig messaged Berwald that it was okay and after replying to all his messages, most of them from Feliciano, he decided to go to Gilbert's room.

The first thing that the noticed was that all of piles of clothes were in folded stacks on the floor and everything else was generally neater, "Opa was definitely in here." Ludwig opened the bird cage and looked inside, "How do I clean out this thing?" He looked online and tried his best to clean the cage and refill the food while the bird rests on his head, "It's not my fault he would let me near the damn thing."

After resting on Gilbert's bed for a few hours, Berwald sent him a message that he was there. Once he went outside, Ludwig sees a car with Berwald and Tino, who waves at him. He's glad that he wasn't alone with his cousin since he has trouble talking and understanding him.

"Ludwig, good to see you!"

Ludwig sits in the back, "Hey, Tino. Didn't realize you drove to school today." "Yeah, I needed to get some groceries, but I can do that later." Ludwig frowned, "Oh, sorry to bother you. Berwald, are your brothers going to join us?" "No. My big brother's busy. And the little one's with Roderich's brother. We'll all go tomorrow." "Huh…alright then."

The three of them made it to the hospital and Ludwig brought up in better detail what happened to Gilbert, "Oh shit! I'm so sorry that happened! Ber Ber, I'll try to get there as soon as I can!" "Don't rush." Ludwig noticed how tense Berwald got and he wasn't sure if it was because of what he said about Gilbert or Tino's driving.

…

Gilbert was playing a game on his phone when he heard a knock, "Hey, that you, West?" Ludwig opened the door, "Bruder, I brought someone new." Ludwig looked at Tino and he furiously shook his head, so Berwald walk up and popped his head in the door.

"Berwald…you came to see me?"

"Yes."

"By yourself?"

Berwald looked at Tino and he furiously shook his head, "…Yes." "Well, ya old bastard, get in here!" Ludwig nudges his cousin forwards and leaves. "Uh, Berry, you can come closer, you know." Berwald hesitates then walks forward, "So, uh, I was surprised when West told me someone really wanted to see me today. Didn't realize how much you cared! Kesesese!"

Berwald stood under one of the lights, which gave him a very menacing appearance, "B-B-Berwald, why don't you s-sit down. You look t-tense…" He nodded then sat down next to the bed, "Much better! Can't believe how tall you are! I like when you're down to my height, though you still look pretty tall sitting too."

The tall boy's expression darkened, "Uhh, so…what's up?" When Berwald moved his arm, Gilbert couldn't help but to flinch out of fear, then Berwald put his arm down. Gilbert tried to laugh away his fear, "Um, did West tell you what happened?" Berwald slowly nods. "Ah, I see. Hah, pretty pathetic, right?"

When he looked back at Berwald, he saw tears in his eyes as he opens and closes his mouth trying to speak. "H-h-hey, come on. Don't do that. Look, I'm all fine! I'll be out in a few days, so don't you worry! Come on, Berry…" Berwald covered his mouth to hide his sobs, but Gilbert grabbed his arm, "No, none of that." He started patting his chest, "Cry here." He pulled his strong cousin over his body and hugged him tight, so Berwald removed his glasses and hugged back.

Once Berwald calmed down, he sat back in the chair and wiped his eyes, "Sorry." "Sor-sorry? Sorry for fuckin' what?! If you ever need some muscles to cry on, your ass better come back to me. I'm honored to have your muscles rub up against mine!" Gilbert saw an unfamiliar expression on Berwald's face, like a mix of surprise, happiness, and a bit of disgust.

"What's so wrong about what I said?!"

His younger cousin looked away, "Aww, come on! Embarrassed? Is that all you came for?" "No." "Then?" Berwald breathed in, then out, "Sor…um…was worried. Last we talked, we argued. Didn't like that, so…sorry. Really." "Oh…" Gilbert covered his mouth, then pounced on Berwald.

"My precious little cinnamon roll!"

Because of the sounds they heard, including Berwald yelling out, Ludwig and Tino rushed into the room. As soon as they get in, they see Gilbert sitting in Berwald's lap, nuzzling him with his arms wrapped around the taller blonde's neck, "Mmmh, I don't care what anyone says, marry me now~!"

"H-h-huoripukki!"

The two cousins quickly notice the red, absolutely livid Tino next to a completely confused Ludwig and Gilbert sighs, "Tino, we talked about this. You're gonna have to start speaking a language we can all understand or I'm just not gonna give a shit." "Get…the _fuck_ off of him, right now!" Gilbert flails his arms, "Yeah…no. Sorry, but your boy toy's gonna have to lay me down himself~!" Berwald blushed, "Cut it out."

Ludwig had to hold Tino back as Berwald gently put Gilbert back on his bed. Gilbert made sure to kiss his cousin's neck before Tino pulled him away, "Haista vittu!" "Not gonna give a sh-" "I said, fuck! Off!" Tino flipped him off while pulling Berwald outside. Once they were out, Tino starts yelling at Berwald.

"Damn, that's gonna be an awkward ride home, am I right?"

Ludwig slapped the back of the brother's head and growled, "What the fu…what the hell is wrong with you?!" "Do you think they have an abusive relationship?" "Stop joking around!" "Wha…being in an abusive relationship is no laughing matter, West!"

"I-I need to sit down…"

Ludwig sat down while Gilbert stares at him seriously, "…Hey, do you think they have amazing make up se-" "I'm not LISTENING anymore!" He quickly covers his ears, "Stop talking! Just stop talking, damn it! I'm not even supposed to be in here alone with you!" Gilbert pokes at him, "Soooo, why don't you leave?"

The young blonde uncovers his ears, "Because…we're gonna be alone at home anyways, so what does it matter?" Gilbert looked genuinely shocked, "Oh snap, West! Mister stickler-for-the-rules over here giving me some sass! But seriously, you really should be heading home now. Don't want the doctors to catch you. I mean, you gotta have homework, right?"

Ludwig sighed and stood up, "Very well. See you at home…uh…" Gilbert had his arms out stretched, "West~!" Ludwig gave his brother a head pat, "Later." Said brother crossed his arms and pouted, "Yes, yes. Uh, keep an eye on those two for me, will ya?" Ludwig slammed the door shut.

As soon as he went in the hall, Tino stood up with a blank expression, "Are you done? Okay, let's go." The shorter boy walked ahead as Berwald walked next to his cousin, looking emotionally drained. There was an uncomfortable silence in the car ride back, with Ludwig looking back and forth at the two boys in the front seats.

Before he could say anything, he got a text from Gilbert telling him to look at Berwald, so he did. He saw Berwald pull out his phone and look at a picture he was sent. He immediately almost dropped his phone and fumbled to put it away, looking very nervous doing so. Tino turned his head for a second before looking back at the road.

Ludwig quickly asked his brother 'what did you send him, idiot?' Gilbert sent him a bunch of laughing emoji, so Ludwig put his phone down with a sigh. Tino pulled into the driveway and point towards the back seat, "Don't forget your homework." Ludwig nods and gets out of the car, "Thank you for the ride. See you tomorrow." Tino smiles and gets ready to back out, "Oh, before you go!"

Ludwig rushes to the passenger side and Berwald lowers the window as Ludwig lowers his head and whispers, "Hey, if there's anything you want to talk about that you feel that can't say in front of…others, I'm here to talk, okay?" Berwald gave an incredulous look before reluctantly nodding yes.

…

The next day was surprisingly uneventful, to Ludwig's satisfaction. The last four days were nothing but drama and craziness, so the usual craziness of his everyday was a welcome change of pace. On the other hand, Francis and Antonio were completely bored, "Franny…texting Gil can only do so much…" "I know, I know. He'll be back tomorrow, but he's still suspended…"

As they sighed, Yekaterina walked up to them, "Uhh, excuse me…" Both boys frown, but give her their attention, "Um…well…w-would either of you happen to know where Gilbert lives?" Francis shifts around, "And why, mademoiselle, should we tell you? Can't you ask him yourself?"

"W-well, I wanted to surprise him when he gets back…?"

They look at each other, then shake their heads and get ready to leave. "No, thank you. That sounds like your problem, not ours," Antonio says flatly and they walk away. She hugs herself and bites down on her lip, "First Roderich and Elizabeta, and now them? I-I really didn't want to do this, but now…" She inhaled and exhaled, then took out her phone and texted her sister. Natalia was in class when she took a peek at her phone, with Ivan on her background picture.

[Сястра: Natasha, Vanya needs Gilbert's address to send him an apology letter, but he's too shy to ask for your help.]

Natalia was absolutely elated and didn't care if her class noticed and she immediately started texting Toris. The Lithuanian boy looked at his phone after his class and saw over 50 texts from Natalia asking him to get the address in a variety of ways, each becoming more and more violent as they go on.

"Aaaaah! Nataliaaaa! She actually texted me~! She didn't delete my number like she said after all!"

Toris immediately makes his way to Feliciano, pushing aside anyone in his way, "Feliciano, can you give me Ludwig's address?" Feliciano smiles at him, "Vee…nope." Feliciano starts to walk away and Toris stops him, "Wait, please!" Feliciano stops smiling, "Okay, but why are you asking me?"

Toris thinks for a bit, "I don't really get along with his older brother, so it would feel too weird if I start talking to him." "Okay…but _why_ do you need it?" Toris quickly looks at his phone and gets a new picture text of Natalia flipping him off.

"And…new background image. Oh, yes! You see, Ivan really wants to send letter of apology to Gilbert, but he doesn't know his address. Can you please ask Ludwig for him, please?"

"Letter? Why not ask for his number to text him?"

"D-did I say letter? I meant present!"

With a sigh, Feliciano looks straight in Toris' eyes, "Wouldn't it be easier for one of his sisters to give Ludwig the present? This sounds kinda weird, vee~" Toris narrows his eyes, not believing that one of the most carefree guys he knows just called him out on his bs.

He gets another text and looks at the Italian boy, "Actually, Ivan is afraid that if Ludwig _told_ Gilbert it was from him that he'll throw it away!" "But Ludwig doesn't _have_ to tell Gil-" "So! He wants to leave an anonymous present at Gilbert's doorstep and surprise him!" "How are you sure Gilbert won't throw away a weird box addressed hi-" "Feliciano! Geez, what the hell?"

Feliciano shrugs, "Vee…Ludwig would ask the same things…" "Please, can you please ask him? I'll help you out with any assignment you get, just…please!" Feliciano fidgets around, "I mean, you don't have to…okay. I'll ask him. I'll let you know after school." Toris grabs Feliciano's hand, "Thank you so much! I promise I'll really make it up to you big time!" Feliciano sighs and rushes to his next class and Toris happily notifies Natalia of his progress.

"Of course, I know, dummy! I'm right here!"

He turns around and she's glaring at him, "N-Natalia! Did you really mean it? We can go out on another date together?" "Date? I said going grocery shopping together, but that's only _if_ I get that address, got it?! We must all make small sacrifices for the greater good, damn it."

…

The next morning, Gilbert was finally released from the hospital. On the way home, Opa Beilschmidt brought up the therapist again, "Gilbert, I know I already mentioned this, but you should really consider seeing this doctor. You know that I can't force you to go, but I heard a lot of good things about this person. A lot of recommendations and they're great with young kids your age…"

"If I say yes, will you stop bothering me about this?"

"Y-maybe…"

Gilbert groans, "Can't force me, my a…butt!" "Gilbert, please. I'm already nervous about leaving you at home on your own…which is why I'll be the one in charge of changing your bandages and holding on to your medication for you." "What?! I am not fuckin' suicidal, old man!" Gilbert growled out. "Gilbert, watch your mouth! You…you know what I mean. I already took the day off so I can keep an eye on you."

The young man slammed his head back in his seat, "What do you expect me to do with one arm in a splint and the other one wrapped up like this?" "I don't know, didn't stop you from cutting up your leg." Gilbert paled and sunk down in his seat.

"Fine, just…set up an appointment when we get back…"

When they reached the house, Gilbert immediately ran to his room, "What the hell happened in here?!" His grandfather pulled on Gilbert's ear, "You're welcome for cleaning up your mess while you were gone. And you should also thank Ludwig for cleaning up after your bird." "Huh…"

Before he could close his door, Opa yelled out, "I'll be out here if you need anything!" "Okay, okay." He closed his door, opened the bird cage, and almost fell face first on his bed until he remembered about his arm. He decided to fall on his back with his arms out, "Everything is so fucking weird now."

The rest of the night was uneventful, as Gilbert felt incredibly tired when he got up, so he barely spoke or ate during dinner. He almost missed that his grandfather said that he already scheduled the appointment for the next afternoon, "I'll also get your cousin's broken car repaired so Ludwig can take you to the hand therapist and other places you need to go, with no detours, Ludwig." "Yes, sir…"

Gilbert pushed his food around, "Gilbert, remember to be careful with that arm. Just because you're home doesn't mean you get to slack off with your exercises…" He noticed Gilbert wasn't paying attention. Opa looked at Ludwig, who shrugged, so he cleared his throat as his face got red.

"I…I could help you in the bathroom."

"What?!"

The table shook as Ludwig tried to hold back his laugh, "Y-you weren't paying attention to me, so…" "Damn, old man. When did _you_ get jokes?" "Regardless, are you feeling alright? Remember, if you need any help changing your shirts or showering, let us know."

Gilbert looked uncomfortable, "Uh, no. I'm good. But…if I were to choose someone to help with those stuff…Berwald?" "Why him?" Ludwig quickly balled up his napkin and threw it at his brother's head, while said brother laughed. "Ludwig, are you mad?! Apologize!" Ludwig picked up his plate and looked away, "I'm sorry that I hit that perverted idiot." "Kesese, you're the one implying things, West!" Their grandfather was incredibly confused.

…

The next day, as Gilbert waited for his grandfather to take him to the therapist, he heard someone sticking something to the front door and then knocked. He waited a few minutes before looking to see if anybody was still there. When he saw no one, he opened the door and an envelope fell. He looking around outside, then picked it up and went back inside.

He saw that it was addressed to him, so he opened it up and found a 'get well soon' card with little birds on it, "Okay, so this person knows my tastes." When opened it, it said 'I hope you feel better soon' And it was signed by 'Иван'. "Huh? What the hell is that? Russian? Oh, maybe Kat sent it to me! She's Russian or something like that. I'll have to thank her later." He put the card by his bed and waited out the rest of his day.

Hours later, his grandfather dropped him off at the therapist's office, "I'll be back to pick you up. Make sure that you behave yourself." "Whatever." He groaned then drove off. Gilbert sat inside the waiting room, until he was called over to the front desk.

He noticed that the receptionist was a blonde kid with glasses around his age, "Are you Gilbert, uh Bell…Beilschmidt?" "Yes?" "Oh, good! Mr. Patel will see you now!" Gilbert felt as if he's seen the kid before, but he pushes the thought aside and walked in the office.

"Hello, you must be Gilbert. You can call me Patel. My first name is a little hard to pronounce."

"…!"

Gilbert stood stunned as the not-too-old older man in a casual suit smiled at him. _Oh my god, he's so hot! He looks like one of those young Bollywood actors!_ Patel lowered his eyebrows, "Sorry, did you want me to call you something else?" "You can call me anything you like." Gilbert shut his mouth after he realized he said that out loud.

Patel laughed, "Okay then, Gilbert. It's alright, you can sit down." Gilbert nervously laughed as he sat down, "Though, I wouldn't mind if you called me 'your awesomeness, Gilbert', kesese" "Hm, that's quite a mouthful, but whatever you feel more comfortable with, your awesomeness!" Gilbert grabbed his chest, held his head down, and held out his hand, "Nope! Too much, too much! G-Gilbert is fine!"

After the session was over, Gilbert walked over to the front desk again, "Hello again! Would you like to set up another appointment?" Gilbert squinted at the boy, "Wait a minute…I _do_ know you!" He proceeds to move behind the counter and walks up to the boy, "Ahh! Y-you're not supposed to be back here!" Gilbert starts sniffing him, "Yeah, you're…" The kid braced himself.

"You're Matthew, right?"

The kid slowly opened his eyes, "Wait, did I hear that right? You called me…by my actual name?" "Yes?" Matthew grabbed Gilbert's shoulders, "Are you sure?! You don't think I'm someone else?!" "Whoa, slow your roll! Are you Matthew or not?"

Matthew let go of him, "Y-yes, I am. How? How do you that I'm Matthew?!" Gilbert backs away, "Well, besides all the times Franny shows off pictures of you two together, the first time we met was during that school baking charity thingy. Your pancake booth was the first and only one I ate at."

Matthew thought on that, "Wait a minute, you're that albino kid who kept asking for more pancakes and wouldn't leave!" Gilbert stepped forward, "What the fu…I'm not albino! I'm just too awesome for melanin! But, then again, you do kinda look like someone I know. Do you have a brother?"

Matthew smiled, "Yes! But you knew that I was Matthew and not Alfred!" "Alfred! That's the guy! He's pretty awesome, but you're more awesome because of those sweet ass pancakes!" Matthew covered his face, "I-I-I…no one's ever said that to me!" "Okay…anyways, why is a student working at a place like this?"

Matthew looked through his fingers, "Well, you see, I used to see Mr. Patel not too long ago. I was so grateful to him that I asked him if I could work here. So, technically I'm a student volunteer, but still! I'm so glad you're seeing him too because he really is a great guy. N-not to say its good thing that you had to see him! I mean, it's good that you're seeing someone for any pro-"

"Okay, okay! I get it! Patel is a hot guy, I know!"

Matthew looked confused, "Is he?" Gilbert's grandfather come through the door, "Oh, done already? Hurry up, let's go." "Thank god! I mean, hit me up at school. I'll be back next week! And if you want my number, ask Francis!" Matthew gave him a warm smile and waved back.

…

It was finally the last official day of his suspension, so Gilbert wanted to do something crazy for his last day home alone, "But what the hell is there to do with this damn arm?!" Then he heard a knock on the door again. He waited a few minutes and it knocked again, this time with the doorbell ringing. Gilbert looked to see who was there.

"Oh shit! Ivan?!"

He quickly ducked down. _Shit shit shit shit! How the fuck did he know where I live?! Did Kat tell him? Wait, I never told her where I lived!_ The doorbell rang several more times, "Allo! Gilbert, are you there?" Gilbert nervously laughed to himself, "Okay, okay okay okay. So, fat ass is here and he knows I'm home and won't go away. Shit." _Why is he here!_

Once he calmed down, Gilbert cracked open the door, "Yes?" Ivan looked relieved, "Gilbert! I'm so glad you're home! I was so afraid you wouldn't be." "What are you doing here?" The tall boy looked at the ground, "I, um, I wanted to know how you were feeling. Did you get my card?"

Gilbert opened the door wider, "You sent that? I thought it was your sister…" Ivan puffed his cheeks, "Did you even tell her that you live here?" "No, but…wait one goddamn minute! How did _you_ know where I live?" Ivan smiles, "I have my ways. Anyways, can I come in?" "Why?"

The Russian boy looked down again, "Ludwig told Katyusha you went to the hospital and then she told me that it was her fault that you were cutting yourself in the first place." "Ahh! Shh! Okay, get it!" He let the other boy in and led him to the living room, "Go on and sit. So, what else did she say?"

Ivan looked at Gilbert's arms, "Why? What happened to you, Gilbert? Why would do this?" "Oh my GOD! How many times do I gotta hear this same shit over and over again?! Why the hell do you even care, fat ass? We were kicking each other's asses a few weeks ago!"

"But I do care…"

Gilbert glared at him, "The fuck you say?" "I care about you, Gilbert! Why would I lie about that?" Gilbert started rubbing his eyes, "Alright, listen up you dumb piece of shit! You have been nothing but a pain in my pale ass since the day we met, so you better be damn well sure I won't believe your stupid ass!"

"But why? Why does Gilbert hate me so much when I don't? I really don't!"

Gilbert slowly stood up, "Fine, I'll tell you why. First, you come to the baseball team acting like you were hot shit. Then, just because I wasn't a pussy who didn't let you roll all over me like everybody else, you fucking BROKE MY ARM! And then after I come back, the fucking team starts shitting on me because you told them you quit because ME? Really?! You break my arm, but it's MY fault you quit?!"

"I didn't…"

"Those assholes told me I was worthless to them and that you were more valuable! I was on that fucking team since the beginning and now they say I'm worthless?! How the fuck do you think that makes me feel?! And now you have the fucking balls to ask me why I fucking hate you so much?! Fuck you! Now you got your fucking answer, prick!"

Ivan stood up, "I…I…" He tried to reach out to the other, but Gilbert unconsciously backed away. "But…I…" Ivan covered his face and cried miserably. "H-hey man, the fuck you doing? I-if there's anyone who should be crying, it should be me."

The larger boy cried harder, "Fat a…Ivan, you can…you can sit down, you know." Ivan stayed standing, "For fu…listen! I'm…sorry? I'm sorry I yelled at you, okay?! I shouldn't have gotten so angry." Ivan started sniffling. "But, can you really blame me?" He started crying again.

"Damn, fine! Just…here! Tissues! Now can you please sit down?"

Gilbert walks over and guides Ivan down to the chair and goes back to his same spot. After waiting for the other to calm down, Gilbert crossed his arms, "Sorry I yelled. But…Ivan, why did you do it? I don't care that you don't like me! I mean, I kinda _really_ do, but that's beside the point. Why did you sell me out?"

Ivan dries his face, "I-I didn't m-mean to. Please l-let me explain." He finally calmed down, "I wasn't trying to be…I wasn't trying to act rude, but the last baseball teams I joined wasn't as lazy as the one here. They weren't taking it as seriously as I was used to, so it frustrated me a lot. But the only person who seemed to be taking it seriously…was you."

Gilbert rose his eyebrow, but let him continue, "You were the only one who took me seriously while everyone seemed so scared and lazy. I found myself really looking forward to going to practice every day…to see you…" "Uh huh, so if that's the case, why'd you break my fucking arm?"

Ivan grabbed his scarf, "It's all my fault! I talked to my mother that morning. I don't have a very good relationship with her, but she called me even though she's not supposed to. She told me a lot of hurtful things and I…let it get to me. I felt so bad the whole day, but I was hoping if I saw you that my mood would get better!"

Ivan squeezed his hands tight, "Um, when I approached you that day, you were so hostile to me! I couldn't figure out why and…and everything else happened in a blur until I heard you scream!" He started tearing up again, "I'm so sorry, Gilbert! I'm sorry! No matter what my reasons are or what mood I was in, I should have never…"

"But you did and here we are."

Ivan quietly sobbed as Gilbert rolled his eyes, "Whatever, okay?! Just tell me you threw me under the bus like that!" Ivan inhaled and exhaled, "Like I said, I didn't mean to! Once you left, the team started blaming me for what happened and I understand that. But once they replaced you, they started badmouthing you! I didn't understand, so I asked them why and they got angry with me! They were telling me how I should be glad that I broke your arm and forced you out like you were a nuisance. I couldn't stand it and told them that I didn't want to be on a team without you and quit right there. I didn't know those words would be cause for harassment!"

Gilbert held his forehead, "Of course they'd think that way, you dummy." When he moved his arm, he put more weight on it than he thought and grabbed it in pain, "Gil!" Ivan sat next to him, "I'm fine…listen. Those guys are assholes who like to talk about other people behind their backs. And they're such assholes that they keep begging me to go back since they suck so much now."

The both of them laugh a little, until Ivan grabs Gilbert's face with both hands, squishing his cheeks in process, "Hey! What are doing, trying to crush my face?!" Ivan sniffled, "Gilbert, I…" He immediately crushed Gilbert's lips on his and the older boy furiously pulls away.

"W-what the he-"

Ivan pulls him in again, this time able to get in Gilbert's mouth. The older boy squeezes his eyes as he starts banging on Ivan's shoulders while Ivan pushes his mouth in deeper. Once Gilbert becomes too tired from resisting, Ivan pulled away and they both start panting.

"Gil…Gilbert, I didn't realize how much you enjoyed my tongue~!"

"You…fucking…bastard! I was trying to push your tongue out of my mouth!"

He then slapped Ivan, "Don't you EVER fucking violate my mouth like that AGAIN without my permission! Got it, asshole?!" Ivan touched his face and got redder, "S-so, I need your permission next time? Got it." "No, I…gah! What do you want from?!"

"Please go out with me."

"No."

Ivan got teary eyed, "B-but why?" Gilbert stands up and put his hand on the other's head, "Listen, kid. I know, I know, you can't resist the allure of an awesome older man. Believe me, I totally understand." He paused in thought, then continued, "What I'm getting is, this is all happening so damn fast…"

He sat back down, "Not only did I get back from the hospital after cutting my wrist open, but do you seriously expect me to completely get over hating you for so long just like that? I have way too much shit going on!" Ivan looked down, "So that's what happened…I'm sorry, Gil Gil. You were going through some much and I didn't even notice."

Ivan gave him a wide genuine smile, "If…when you finish sorting out your feelings, will you hear me out then?" "Uhhhh…I will consider it?" Ivan hugged him tightly, "I love you so much!" "Uh huh. Actually, aren't you dating that brown-haired guy that follows you around? Or was it tha-"

"Let's not talk about that. Can I kiss you again?"

"I…you have…the fuckin'…fine."

…

The next few weeks were pretty good for Gilbert. He went back to school and everyone, including his classmates, actually missed him. He had to explain away his splint and bandages as a kitchen accident which convinced the other kids. What confused everyone was Gilbert's relationship with Ivan.

Before they were gone, they were going at each other's throats and now Ivan is hanging off of the other boy while Gilbert tolerates him. Gilbert had to explain to his grandfather that him and Ivan made up so the school staff wouldn't have to keep tabs on them when they're together.

Gilbert also took the opportunity to explain his relationship with Yekaterina to his friends, "You see, it all started when I went inside her bathroom stall…" Despite his train wreck of an explanation, his friends were reluctantly fine with her. She was someone for Gilbert to hang out with when they were busy, so they respected that and Eliza had another girl to talk with.

He was even approached by Berwald, who wanted to set the record straight with his cousin. "Berry, to what do I owe this honor?" "Mmh, please stop teasin' Tino." Gilbert got closer, "Tease _him_ , not you?" "M-me too." "And what, pray tell, am I doing that's so bad?" The tall boy steps back, "Stuff like that." "Kesese, stuff like what? I won't know until you tell me precisely what I'm doing wrong." Gilbert walked up. "Mmh, getting close to me." "And?" "T-touching me."

Gilbert rests his chest on the other's, "And what else did I do?" "K-k-kiss me." When Gilbert put has face on his cousin's neck, Berwald pushed him off and gave his usual intense stare albeit with a red face, "That shit. STOP IT." Gilbert backed away this time, "Okay, okay. S-sorry, alright? You're just so cute, that I-" "Not cute. Cut it out." Gilbert held up his hands, "You most certainly are cute, but okay. I get it! I'll be more respectful of your personal space…especially around your guy." Berwald nods, "Thank you. Wait, what did you say?"

He similarly started hanging out with Matthew, which made Francis really happy because he always wanted his younger friend to meet more people. And because of that, he got to see more of Alfred and, in turn, Arthur. Whenever Gilbert would mention loving Matthew's cooking, Arthur would promise to make something delicious for his classmate, much to Matthew and Alfred's horror and Gilbert's confusion.

The two of them would also talk after Gilbert's session's with Patel, who he was completely enamored with for all the help he's given him and not because he wanted to hear his voice or look into his eyes. Then he realized that he should probably recommend Katyusha see him too. They haven't talked much about cutting since he came back, so he figured that he'll have to bring it up naturally.

One afternoon, when the two of them were alone doing homework, Gilbert spoke up, "So, Kat…you still cutting?" She stopped and looked at him. "Don't stare at me like that. I was gonna mention it eventually!" He grabbed her arm and tried to pull it closer, but she forced it down.

"Gilbert, what the hell are you doing?"

He let go, "You're not saying anything! I only wanted to see if you still were! I already told you what I did was my own fault. I know now that if you didn't tell me about cutting myself, I would've done something else destructive. Remember how I got suspended for beating up your little brother's ass?"

She glared at him, so he backpaddled, "Uh, so, where _is_ Ivan? Haven't seen him much today." "Vanya owed Natasha a favor and has been dreading it all day. They're together right now." Gilbert was curious about how a frightened Ivan would look like, "Uh, anyways! I'm just concerned about you, okay?"

He put his hand on hers, but she immediately moves it away, "Come on, can't you at least take me serious here?" Katyusha stopped what she was doing, "Take you, of all people, seriously?" Gilbert thought about his next action and moved closer to her, "Yes, please. Do you really want something like this to happen to you? Feeling so desperate and cornered that you felt like you had no choice but to fucking end it all?"

Yekaterina lowered her head, "Gilbert, I…" He gently touched her face and brushed his thumb on her cheek, "Please, listen to me. I really do care about you and if you really care about me, then please at least consider seeing someone about this." Her lips start trembling, so Gilbert pulls her forwards and kisses her.

When he pulls away, she looks at him stone-faced, "O…kay, not the reaction I was going for…" "Hard pass." "The hell? You looked like you were gonna cry, so I wanted to calm you down! You're really telling me you didn't feel anything from that?" "Don't be gross."

Gilbert was honestly caught off guard by that comment and looked away with a pout, so Katyusha surprised him with a kiss on his cheek, "W-what was _that_ for?" "You looked like you were going to cry, so…" He pouted more, "You missed my lips!" He took out a card and slammed it on the table, "Here, call him! See if I ever comfort your ass again…"

She takes it and smiles, "Thank you, Gilbert. You really are my best friend." Gilbert's face becomes completely red as he turns his whole body away from her, "W-w-well, of course! Why wouldn't you have someone as a-awesome as me as your best friend?" Katyusha laughs as Gilbert wipes his eyes smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's done. It's finally done! I'm so glad I still remembered how I wanted to end this after all that time! I want to thank all of the readers for reading and all of the reviewers for the love. I truly am sorry for the long long long wait and I can only hope that I didn't disappoint. Much love and thank you for reading! ^_~*


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